Love Must Be Tough

cheng sim

2012-02-05T12:54:00.002-05:00

hokkien Cheng Sim= Give up hope

yes this is exactly what i am feeling now.
i think i've really given up hope on you.
You dont call, you dont text.
You give me stupid excuses like "i'm busy at work."
"im tired"

i really don't know how long more am i going to do this.
how long more am i going to wait.
so are we really going to get the flat?
are we really going to get married?
i dont want to get married to you and suffer.
i dont want to get married and be alone because u dont care u dont call.

right at this moment,
i really want to tell you that i want to breakup for good.

Thanks.

cheng sim,
tracy

Happy Dragon Year :]

2012-01-27T02:22:00.006-05:00

So its already the 5th day of CNY.
dont really like CNY except for the angbaos, food and gambling!
Anyway would like to see what i have achieved now that we are 1 month into 2012!

Here's my new year resolution for 2012 and the things i wish i could get in 2012! :] :

1. To travel to either one of the countries: Korea, Japan, New Zealand or Taiwan

2. ~~To lose 5~~ MORE KG! (i lost 2kg!)

3. ~~To buy a personal car ( Jazz, Fit, i30)~~
4. ~~32, 37 or 40 inch LED TV in my room!~~ (32" TV in my room!)

5. A gd 26 year old birthday! (am still hoping for a gd one!)

6. Chanel earrings

7. More sleep and more exercise!

8. A really happy love life and an SO that loves me as much as i love him.

9. To learn more good things in life

10. to have more close friends just like the ones in 2011 :] these are the people who still stood by me at my lowest point

11. More Dresses, Shoes and bags! oh i welcome vouchers for these!

12. A new bigger wardrobe!! For more clothes!!

13. New side cabinet

14. A trip to a country nearby with my whole family :]

15. to be less emotional and happier

16. Win more 4D and TOTO!!

17. lastly Jumping.Up.Like.I.Am.Nuts

18. if i remember anything else, i'll add on

anyway i am turing 26 in about 22 more days :(
the feeling of the last year as someone in her mid twenties kinda sucks :(
Here are some things i wish i will be able to get for my birthday.
either by myself or even gifts from others! :X

1. birthday celebration at one of these places : Mimolette, the White rabbit or some really good traditional korean bbq place!
2. a new big bag so i can put alot of things for work(easy to sling and hand carry. Charles & keith, Coach, Burberry, Kate Spade or Agnes B)
3. nice looking 15" laptop bag with handle and sling
4. tiffany & co necklace : Elsa Perretti Bean pendant, Paloma Picasso Loving Heart, Paloma Tenderness Heart Pendant.
5. at least 1 yummy bdae cake.
6. vouchers to buy clothes and shoes!!!
7. Everyone around me to be healthy and happy
8. That should be about all :]

Love always,
tracy..

Looking back on 2011

2011-12-31T08:02:00.004-05:00

Today is the last day of 2011.
Looking back over the last 364 days,
what you have accomplished or done?
Or what have you failed to achieve?
Or what was the best thing that ever happened to you this year?

For me, its such a roller coaster ride that my ride keeps heading down
and i keep getting dizzier as each moment passes by and totally have no idea what exactly happened the entire year.

Looking back i think in terms of my career i did well.
Got a good paying job with wonderful colleagues although better paying means
more stress but comparing to my first events job, THIS IS PARADISE! ;D

Family, i've grown closer to them and yeah we've a new member, Booboo.
My yummilicious looking dog who looks like a soft toy!
Such a joy to have him in the house although he can be such a terror at times.
When i've mentioned i've grown closer to my family,
i spent more time with them.
More family gathering with al my other relatives!
Such closeness i like.

Love wise, its still a roller coaster.
Probably worst than last year.
Someone from the past came back.
Someone i used to love hurt me bad.

although this isnt a really gd year,
but im thankful that certain events happened.
Happy that i could still be happy.
Even though its just that short few days.

Welcoming 2012, i hope my career will improve and that i will be able to concentrate more. Moneywise hopefully i will be able to save more money, get a car since the benefits from the current company is good. Spend more precious time with my family and love, let everything good fall back in place. I deserve someone who will love me as much as i love him.

I hope everything for my life will fall into place in 2012 and be so much better.

Here's my new year resolution for 2012 and the things i wish i could get in 2012! :] :

1. To travel to either one of the countries: Korea, Japan, New Zealand or Taiwan

2. To lose 5 MORE KG!

3. To buy a personal car ( Jazz, Fit, i30)

4. 32, 37 or 40 inch LED TV in my room!

5. A gd 26 year old birthday!

6. Chanel earrings

7. More sleep and more exercise!

8. A really happy love life and an SO that loves me as much as i love him.

9. To learn more good things in life

10. to have more close friends just like the ones in 2011 :] these are the people who still stood by me at my lowest point

11. More Dresses, Shoes and bags! oh i welcome vouchers for these!

12. A new bigger wardrobe!! For more clothes!!

13. New side cabinet

14. A trip to a country nearby with my whole family :]

15. to be less emotional and happier

16. Win more 4D and TOTO!!

17. lastly Jumping.Up.Like.I.Am.Nuts

18. if i remember anything else, i'll add on

i end this post with a smiley photo of myself :]

Love always,
Tracy

再一次相遇我会紧紧抱著你

2011-12-18T02:11:00.002-05:00

又回到最初的起点
记忆中你青涩的脸
我们终於来到了这一天
桌垫下的老照片
无数回忆连结
今天男孩要赴女孩最后的约
又回到最初的起点
呆呆地站在镜子前
笨拙系上红色领带的结
将头发梳成大人模样
穿上一身帅气西装
等会儿见你一定比想像美
好想再回到那些年的时光
回到教室座位前后故意讨你温柔的骂
黑板上排列组合你舍得解开吗
谁与谁坐他又爱著她
那些年错过的大雨
那些年错过的爱情
好想拥抱你拥抱错过的勇气
曾经想征服全世界
到最后回首才发现
这世界滴滴点点全部都是你
那些年错过的大雨
那些年错过的爱情
好想告诉你告诉你我没有忘记
那天晚上满天星星
平行时空下的约定
再一次相遇我会紧紧抱著你
紧紧抱著你
又回到最初的起点
呆呆地站在镜子前
笨拙系上红色领带的结
将头发梳成大人模样
穿上一身帅气西装
等会儿见你一定比想像美
好想再回到那些年的时光
回到教室座位前后故意讨你温柔的骂
黑板上排列组合你舍得解开吗
谁与谁坐他又爱著她
那些年错过的大雨
那些年错过的爱情
好想拥抱你拥抱错过的勇气
曾经想征服全世界
到最后回首才发现
这世界滴滴点点全部都是你
那些年错过的大雨
那些年错过的爱情
好想告诉你告诉你我没有忘记
那天晚上满天星星
平行时空下的约定
再一次相遇我会紧紧抱著你
紧紧抱著你
那些年错过的大雨
那些年错过的爱情
好想拥抱你拥抱错过的勇气
曾经想征服全世界
到最后回首才发现
这世界滴滴点点全部都是你
那些年错过的大雨
那些年错过的爱情
好想告诉你告诉你我没有忘记
那天晚上满天星星
平行时空下的约定
再一次相遇我会紧紧抱著你
紧紧抱著你

那些年错过的大雨那些年错过的爱情好想告诉你告诉你我没有忘记那天晚上满天星星平行时空下的约定再一次相遇我会紧紧抱著你紧紧抱著你那些年错过的大雨那些年错过的爱情好想拥抱你拥抱错过的勇气

love always,

tracy

你还是要幸福

2011-12-01T20:26:00.001-05:00

For you J. 你还是要幸福

不确定就别亲吻
感情很容易毁了一个人
一个人若不够狠
爱淡了不离不弃多残忍

你留下来的垃圾
我一天一天总会丢完的
我甚至真心真意的祝福
永恒在你的身上先发生

你还是要幸福
你千万不要再招惹别人哭
所有错误从我这里落幕
别跟着我铭心刻骨

你还是要幸福
我才能确定我还得很清楚
确定自己再也不会占据
你的篇幅
明天开始
这一切都结束

还我钥匙的备份
我觉得再见可以很单纯
我甚至真心真意的祝福
永恒在你的身上先发生

你还是要幸福
你千万不要再招惹别人哭
所有错误从我这里落幕
别跟着我铭心刻骨

你还是要幸福
我才能确定我还得很清楚
确定自己再也不会占据
你的篇幅
明天开始
这一切都结束

你还是要幸福
你千万不要再招惹别人哭
所有错误从我这里落幕
别跟着我铭心刻骨

你如果很幸福
半夜的简讯我就无需回覆
因为你的悲喜已经有了
容身之处我也能有
最纯粹的孤独

this is the last time im going to say this.
Jumping.Up.Like.I.Am.Nuts

i hope you are happy. i really wish you will be.
its just not fated to be :]
thank you for the memories :]

love always,
Tracy

2011 Christmas Wishlist!

2011-11-25T07:54:00.006-05:00

So its that time of the year for my Christmas wishlist again.
looked back on the past entries and found 1 in 2009 where i did up a christmas wishlist.
shall take a look and see what have i accomplished or gotten over 2 years!

1. A new digital camera please! (Canon please and if there's any sand proof ones)CHECKED! Got a Canon HS 220!
2. Lasik.... ( i can't stand how dry my eyes are even when wearing dailies) CHECKED! Finally!! Not dependant on glasses and contacts!!
4. A trip to BKK please. ( i need to drink my thai ice milk tea and my zhu jiao fan!)CHECKED! headed down to bkk with Andy in August 2011 :]
6. A better pay so that i can do more.... CHECKED! better paying job or so to speak!
7. More time with my family and frens... ( i know this will prolly be one of the toughest to accomplish given the kind of job i hold..) CHECKED! having brekkie with Dad every weekeday!
8. Make more frens that are worth keeping :] CHECKED! finally found the few who would really stay by my side in tough times!
12. A diamond ring ( dun need those in the thousands, those less than $200 i'll be happy too )CHECKED. from andy in 2010.
15. Fairer and better complesxion CHECKED. on the way :]
22. To watch NEW MOON!! CHECKED. gonna watch Breaking Dawn tmr!!
24. drink lesser CHECKED! dun drink as much already!!
25. healthier me CHECKED! i seldom have flu now!!
26. drink more toffee nut frappe before the season is over.. AHHH!!! CHECKED TOFFEE NUT IS BACK!
27. spend a wonderful Xmas, NY, VDAY, CNY and My 24th Bdae.. :] i am approaching 26!!

So below are the items i didn't managed to get or accomplished :( - :

3. Gift Vouchers ( levis, Taka, Isetan, Charles & keith, URS, ALDO, Forever 21, Topshop etc.)

5. Preferably to travel again to Taiwan or even a short getaway to Redang Island or Aussie!

9. A better love life and a deserving SO ( Significant Other) 10. A new wallet ( Gucci, LV, Burberry) 11. A sling bag big even for normal weekend trips ( size of an A4 paper, Gucci, LV or COACH)

13. A gym membership / slimming / yoga or facial centre membership

14. To lose 5 more KG

16. Learn a new language

17. Own personal car so that i can bring my family out every weekend

18. Less emotional and not so affected by every single little thing

19. Happier and to smile more..

20. think and worry lesser

21. Chocolate buffet at Fullerton

28. wii

29. 1 or 2 seater sofa or 1 or 2 seater bean bag for my room

31. CK Euphoria Perfume for Women

32. Christian Dior Miss Cherie Perfume

33. Dinner with you at Meritus Mandarin Chatter Box, CHICKEN RICE followed by durians

34. 6 slices or 6 whole small cakes from 6 different person for my bdae

35. Caramel brown hair, rebonded hair and gorgeous bangs

36. Abalone for CNY

37. Chanel Stud earrings

This is so true.

2011-11-20T02:27:00.000-05:00

This is so true :]

很爱过

2011-11-19T12:21:00.000-05:00

丁当 - 很爱过

谢谢你从来没有觉得我不够好
谢谢你守护我的每一分每一秒
谢谢当天塌下来你也会帮我顶着
冰的固执水才会懂

终于让时间回过头来笑我们傻
但暴雨都要淋过才能逼得人成长
没有地久没有天长没有最美的花
只有遗忘能让眼泪流光

很爱过很痛过我们为了彼此而活过
你爱我拥抱着我却让我看不见星空
我们都没有错没有谁比较寂寞
我的世界早已经不是以前

也许以后再也没人比你更爱我
也许以后我也不可能再那样活
每当想起你的时候快乐都比较多
也许快乐是时间的幽默

很爱过很痛过我们为了彼此而活过
你爱我拥抱着我却让我看不见星空
我们都没有错没有谁比较寂寞
我的世界早已经不是以前

多少天多少夜爱一个人很难爱自己更难
清晨醒来所有美梦都不见

很爱过很痛过我们为了彼此而活过
你爱我拥抱着我却让我看不见星空
我们都没有错没有谁比较寂寞
我的世界早已经不是以前

Better Half of me..

2011-10-30T08:34:00.002-04:00

This song really speaks of what im feeling now exactly.. :]

Better Half Of Me

Broken promises that are like road kill
They’re on the side of the street
Concrete casualties of love
Chewed up and spit out
Raise high then drop down and now
I don’t know what’s left of me

And I collect myself
And crawl through the shadows
Reach out my hand to the sky and shout out
I’ll never make these same mistakes again
Cause someone out there holds the key to my heart
And do everything to tear it apart
By never allowing myself to let you in

When all I want is for you to see
The side that I don’t show to anyone
In fear that they may turn and run
Alone and incomplete
No more tears to cry
No more blood to bleed

I’ll fall forever endlessly
When you should be the ground beneath my feet
The better half of me

燕燕你好傻。

2011-10-26T04:29:00.001-04:00

等了六年就为了再等多一次的伤心失望。燕燕你好傻。

快乐剩一人分享快乐就只剩一半

2011-09-18T04:23:00.003-04:00

丁当 - 一半

喝酒的伴一起看电影的伴
早午晚餐的那个伴
朋友不能留得太晚
明天要上班
唱K的伴一起去旅行的伴
听懂我的笑话的伴
我的生活只差那个人就美满

快乐剩一人分享快乐就只剩一半
喝一碗汤
心怎么都不够暖
这张被单这张睡床
再舒服都觉得太宽

没人分享幸福就只剩一半
就算把日子都填满
节日却提醒我孤单

没有想法有想法又能怎样
只能写部落格整晚
几个留言安慰不了心里的遗憾
没有负担原来也是种负担
自由多得让人心慌
你羡慕我那要不要跟我交换

快乐剩一人分享快乐就只剩一半
喝一碗汤
心怎么都不够暖
这张被单这张睡床
再舒服都觉得太宽

没人分享幸福就只剩一半
努力把日子填满
别来提醒我多孤单

快乐剩一人分享快乐就只剩一半
喝一碗汤
心怎么都不够暖
这张被单这张睡床
再舒服都觉得太宽

没人分享幸福就只剩一半
就算把日子都填满
没人知道我多孤单

I smurf you.

2011-09-11T11:40:00.005-04:00

i Smurf food. :]
caught the smurf movie with my colleagues on a friday night.
cute movie i must say.

had some home made Bibimbap from my Aunty.
Fantabulous!
BooBoo was craving for some as well..
Haha!

anyway side track.
sometimes i think you're really cute..
but sometimes i think you're an arse.
i told you before when we were in the BKK hotel room,
to flip one side of the shoes up when we are in the room.
So 2 weeks back when you came over to my place to stay
so you could wake up earlier to travel down with me for my lasik,
you actually flipped one side of your slipper up when you placed it in my room.
-_-''

but the amount of hurt and pain you've inflicted on me..
:]

relationships that hurt, dont need to be saved.
how true now brown cow?

New kid on the block :}

BooBoo

Mr Happy called me about a month back.
He's getting married next March.
Am happy for him as well :]

love always,
tracy

you were never part of me.

2011-03-13T04:40:00.003-04:00

everytime i am always alone.
even when you are free, you will be spending your time sleeping, doing useless stuffs or going
out with useless friends who are always there to take adavantage of you.
as for me? i will always have to queue and wait for you..
and wait and wait..

weekends i'm always alone.. so lonely..
sometimes i wish i was dead.
so what if i have alot of friends ad family members?
its still the same old shit time and again.

so tired that i feel im really gonna breakdown for good soon.
i dont have the best work place.. dun have the best bosses..
i have nice colleagues which is omething comforting to my soul..
shitarse requirements and threats from someone there...
sometimes i wonder izzit my life or izzit that im jinxed to work in farked up places?

maybe i am really jinxed.
not really in the best of mood and health
and i still need to put up with the shit from my family.
seriously whats wrong with you all?
just because i am working means i need to buy a computer for him?
FOR WHAT FARK?
SO THAT HE CAN USE THE COMPUTER AND PLAY GAMES?
WHAT FARKING CHEEBYE RULE IS THAT?

CCB.

sometimes i really wish i am dead.
because now I AM ALL ALONE.

dying,
tracy

tired

2011-02-23T11:40:00.004-05:00

oh man.. super duper tired out...
been working really late for the past couple of days...
sigh...

just got back from work..
gonna head to bed soon...
head is spinning like mad...
well nvm!
2 more days and its the weekends!!

oh man i cant wait...
wanna sit down in front of the com and watch all my fav drama serials!! :D

i wanna go for full body massages and also learn yoga...
WHEN DO I HAVE TIME ???

:((

off to bed!!

You don't pick who you fall in love with and it never happens like how it should

Love always,
Tracy

why am i waiting?

2011-02-19T13:59:00.002-05:00

and so i see the need to blog again..
seriously why am i always waiting?
always waiting for him..
so he PROMISED to tell me where he will go..
but ive been trying to call him for the past 4 hrs..
no answer no text..
cb kia is going to come home and tell me all sorts of reasons again...

sometimes i really want to pick myself up and leave..
but i just cant muster enough of that courage to leave..
why do i always put myself through such shit?
TELL ME WHY?

fark it. i am just plain stupid.
YEAH

love always,
Tracy

I need to blog!

2011-02-18T14:30:00.001-05:00

Felt the sudden need to blog. The sudden need to release my innermost feelings :((

Plenty of things has happened. Basically roller coaster has been traveling down all the way. Sick and tired of life. How it always ends up this way. Why can't I be happy?

I want you but I can't have you ?

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Gonna emo to slp.

NiteZ

Love always,
Tracy

Tell me what to do?

2010-11-21T06:51:00.006-05:00

so the past few months have been much of a roller coaster ride..
I must say its been going down down down all the way..
so it makes me wonder, when will this ride ever head up as i'm getting pukey all over and its not a gd feeling plus not exactly a pretty sight ?
so there have been some movements in my life.. :]

change of job, change of sleeping habits, change of meals and also change of moods very QUICKLY.
Besides the crazy rollercoaster ride i am on,
there have been some happy stuffs happening!

Attended the best bud's ROM last month!
Happy for her and i wish her and Morveen eternal bliss!

Also had a rather happy dinner celebration last night for Grandma's 67th birthday!
quite a big turnout considering the small family i had.
Had my favourite thai food at Nakhon Kitchen located at Bedok North.
Dishes came in x2 to x3 for 11pax with drinks and desserts and the final bill, $245!

A couple of weeks back, the BF and i headed to Clark Quay on a Sat for dinner and drinks.
Tried out this restaurant, Hot Stones which i must say was a pretty gd experience for the both of us.
Those who knows me well knows i NEVER takes beef..
but i can't help but to tried the beef here.
its so fresh , tender and sweet to the palette.
and best part of it, doesn't have that beefy taste that i hate.
Ordered for myself the pork tenderloin which i think could be better.

Adjourned to Highlander for drinks!
I am a beer convert.
Have been drinking more beer than anything else lately.
And yes i love Hoegarrden and housebeers the best :X

below are also some other photos taken on different dates :]

Clubbing with a long lost Poly mate :X

Was out with Pris on Friday for dinner, beer, desserts and drinks at all 4 different locations!! hahahaha from PS to Orchard and back!!

Clubbing with Jerms, Xue Kun & Yubin on a Wednesday! Mambo!! oh how much i miss Mambo nights!

Finally done with this entry and am heading to bed now.There's so much i wanna do wanna say and so much i hope for things to get better..i believe it will in time to come :]

Love always,

tracy

Conjunctivitis

2010-08-20T09:14:00.004-04:00

Yes 2 days back i was diagnosed with conjuntivitis of the eye.
I woke up in the morning feeling a bit weird.
something's wrong with my left eye...
felt like i've been punched in the eye...

got out of bed and hurried to the mirror.......
to my horror, my entire left eye lids were puffed up and swollen..
and the worst was my eye whites......

Conjunctivitis (also called "madras eye" or "pink eye") is an acute inflammation of the conjunctiva (the outermost layer of the eye and the inner surface of the eyelids), most commonly due to an allergic reaction or an infection (usually viral, but sometimes bacterial).

not gonna post any photos of it up here as its really bad...
just imagine soggy eye whites and sunken in pupil!!!
i thought i was really really going blind..
checked with the doctor why such infections will happen..
reason given: probably someone passed it to me and probably it just happened !! -_-'''
RIGHT!

Made some homemade Red Bean and Barley dessert!
Oh man how well red bean and barley goes together!
Tasted really good!

Bf got me the iPhone 4 last week.
Comparing it to the 3Gs,
its definitely much faster,
images are so much sharper..
viewing things on the iPhone are clearer and the best part,
the camera's much sharper, clearer and it comes with flash..
and there's a front camera! good for those who loves to take self portraits!
Flash is adjustable as well...
One down side is, both the front and back is made of glass
which really makes it very heavy to hold for a long time..
and if you're keen to switch to an iPhone 4,

be prepared to change your normal sim card to a microsim!

taken without flash..

the iPhone 4 box was taken with a 3G iPhone..

anyone keen for a Longchamp bag spree?a relative of mine is going to Europe, can get the bags at arnd 25% less den SG retail price!

love always,
tracy

if i promise to blog everyday from now on...

2010-08-19T14:20:00.004-04:00

if i promise to blog everyday from now on,

will you come back everyday to view my entries?

yes I've left that company :]

was out with the bf to run some errands later in the afternoon.

had our favourite Thai food at Geylang Lor 34.

Super gd and authentic Thai food at an even more amazing price!

Stir fry veggies, plain rice with egg, tom yum soup and garlic roasted pork at the price of $26!

ok la i consider that really cheap!

adjourned to his dad's place to help with some computer stuff while i surf the cable tv..

Was walking out for dinner when we spoke about how pricing in SG has increased sooo much.

Things like bus fares, our daily necessities and even food..

Which brings us back to the time when we were in Pri or even Sec school!!

I always remembered one of the stalls which sells noodles, one of my fav!

Each bowl of noodles cost like $0.50?? :(

even the chin chow drink only costs $0.30 to $0.50 la

sigh everything is increasing...

the only thing that doesnt increase is our pay......

off to bed..

dream a little dream of me...

love always,

Tracy

我的錯

2010-08-12T13:39:00.002-04:00

飞机已离开机场

你选择了前往你的方向不再迷惘

忘了我们爱的过往

忘了我给你的伤学会坚强

从前的我不懂你牺牲多大

为我失去朋友不讲

还放弃了所有梦想

觉得没怎样不会将心比心去想

让你慢慢慢慢失去了希望

能不能夠再给我机会好好的爱你

我会仔细的聆听你对我说的一言一语

我会学会去控制脾气不让你伤心

对你好好的去珍惜请你相信我的心还是爱你

我想再重来一次

回到过去弥补你的伤没那种事

怎么做才能夠停止

后悔竟伤你如此不再放肆

为何总到失去才懂的难过

当你在我身边的时候总是为我默默守候

都是为我的错错过这难得的拥有

就让你爱我的心慢慢溜走

能不能夠再给我机会好好的爱你

我会仔细的聆听你对我说的一言一语

我会学会去控制脾气不让你伤心

对你好好的去珍惜请你相信我的心还是爱你

sigh,

tracy

its tiring to love you...

2010-07-21T13:28:00.005-04:00

so quite a couple of things has happened in the past 1 month..
making it something like the worst period of my life :]
sigh...
9 more days and i'm leaving Urban..

feels weird actually because i've been there for almost 2.5years and i'm leaving le...
hmz.. hahahah well.. i guess everyone has to move on..
since i've not excel much there...
probably should move elsewhere and also complete my degree..

just wanna update a couple of the photos that i've took for the past few months!

The Fatty bro turned 21!

Pris Ma turned 24! and congrats for getting engaged!! So happy for you!
and lately i have a crazy obssesion over Koi Bubble tea! Look at the amount i have been drinking everyweek!!! Fattening man!

Audi Umbrella :]
Drunk~!
Liang Teh and Kai Sheng Cha for myself during PC show cos i completely lost my voice!

A trip to JB with Calvin , Romeo, Kenneth and the rest! Lurve the massages, seafood, char kway tiao, durians and carwash!

Thats about all for now.. off to bed :]

its tiring to love you ..

Love always,

tracy

說謊

2010-07-19T13:40:00.002-04:00

是有過幾個不錯對象
說起來并不寂寞孤單
可能我浪盪　讓人家不安
才會結果都健忘
我沒有什麼陰影魔掌　你千萬不要放在心上
我又不脆弱　何況那算什麼傷
反正愛情不就都這樣

我沒有說謊　我何必說謊
你懂我的　我對你從來就不會假裝
我哪有說謊　請別以為你有多難忘
消失　真的不是我逞強

我好久沒來這間餐廳　沒想到已經換了裝潢
角落那窗口　聞得到玫瑰花香　被你一說是有些影響
　

我沒有說謊　我何必說謊
你知道的　我缺點之一就是很健忘
我哪有說謊　是很感謝今晚的相伴
但我竟然有些不習慣

我沒有說謊　我何必說謊
愛一個人沒愛到難道就會怎麼樣
別說我說謊　人生已經如此的艱難
有些事情就不要拆穿
我沒有說謊　是愛情說謊
它帶你來　騙我說　可我　沒有可能有希望
我沒有說謊　祝你做個幸福的新娘
我的心事請你全遺忘

so troubled lately...
i wish everything will come to an end please...
its seriously driving me crazy..
sigh..

love always,
tracy

2010-07-19T06:23:00.002-04:00

I NEED REPLACEMENTS!!

something happened to me lately... and i badly need replacements for the following..
So if u are kind enough, please donate to the Tracy's Fund!

1. A new digital camera please! (Canon please and if there's any sand proof ones, mine was gone even with my SD card :( )
2. Lasik.... ( i can't stand how dry my eyes are even when wearing dailies)
3. Gift Vouchers ( levis, Taka, Isetan, Charles & keithURS, ALDO, Forever 21, Topshop etc.)
4. A trip to BKK please. ( i need to drink my thai ice milk tea and my zhu jiao fan!)
5. A better pay so that i can do more....
7. More time with my family and frens... ( i know this will prolly be one of the toughest to accomplish given the kind of job i hold..)
8. A better love life and a deserving SO ( Significant Other)
9. A new wallet ( Gucci, LV, Burberry)
10. A sling bag big even for normal weekend trips ( size of an A4 paper, Gucci, LV or COACH)
11. A gym membership / slimming / yoga or facial centre membership
12. To lose 5 more KG
13. Fairer and better complesxion
14. Learn a new language
15. Own personal car so that i can bring my family out every weekend
16. Happier and to smile more..
17. think and worry lesser
18. Chocolate buffet at Fullerton
19. to see you at least once a week
20. drink lesser
21. healthier me
22. iPhone 4G PLEASE!
23. 1 or 2 seater sofa or 1 or 2 seater bean bag for my room
24. Christian Dior Miss Cherie Perfume
25. Chanel Stud earrings
26. to be continued..

Love always,
Tracy

7 its a long journey..

2010-06-15T12:27:00.002-04:00

Finally PC show is over.
you know what is amazing?
i woke up one day with totally no voice.
WTF!
and it was the 2nd day of setup somemore..
so i managed to pull through PC Show with no voice.
And now its the 3rd day after PC show and still no voice.

Went to see a doc earlier.
Very serious throat infection.
Listened to Calvin and bought *kai Sheng Cha* to drink.
NB! as need to boil on my own, so i could see what kind of herbal med there were inside..
there were some kind of blue shiny green insect inside as well.
so as well the drink came out GREEN.
and it tasted damn disgusting..

am counting down to 1 and a half months more before i leave UC :]
have not officially found another job..
but definitely have a couple of offers that i am considering :]]

at this point, i am still missing u :]
sometimes i wonder whats the point of holding on?

sometimes i feel really stupid..
sometimes i feel i no longer know what i am doing anymore.
at a distance i watch you..
at times i feel probably i shouldnt know you too well..
cos its hurts badly..
it hurts badly to see you standing right in front of me
but there is nothing i could do..

off to rest my throat.
Nitez.

Love always,
tracy

Tired

2010-05-21T13:21:00.001-04:00

I am really so tired..
I just wanna run away and hide..
I miss u so much Mr Happy..
Wish I could live happily ever after :]

Love always,
Tracy

2010-05-21T13:20:00.001-04:00

Feels so trap

2010-04-11T12:02:00.001-04:00

Am so not looking forward to the 15th of April. Am so worried abt this one particular thing.

Sigh.. Isn't it always the case of u n mi that never gets settled?

Think I better head off to bed. Nitez

Love always,
tracy

Get Sexy :]

2010-04-04T00:46:00.002-04:00

and so i havent been blogging for more than a month.
Am so sorry as i've been partying quite hard for the past month.
yes its back to those good old days where u'll see me in a club/pub on a friday or saturday, drinking and partying my arse away.

makes me wonder at times wtf am i doing.
partying so hard.
-_-'' oh wells..

photos up next..
I'll let the photos do the talking as i'm very very lazy to say too much...
:]

Randoms:

26 March 2010:
Actually headed out with EnLong on a random friday night to drink..
met him at Illuzion, and yes he lost to mi in 5/10 but i lost to Rong Hui!
Great ah u!!!
En Long sent me over to Mong Kok to look for Jeffrey which after he headed back to the pub..
Drank and sang with Jeffrey and Aloysius for a while before En Long headed down to pick me and we headed down to Zouk.
Great again...
Cos we entered Phuture at 3.30am!
Yes Mr Chua hates to club. gd.
Went to look for his frens Keidi & Yvonne,
the folks left after a while which leaves me and him at Zouk drinking away..
i drank so much that night i think i really started to blabber rubbish to him..
such a headache to drink so much that i had to do the stupidest thing outside Zouk..
Thank you Mr Chua for your lap and patience :D
and "make me drunk and fark mi until die... great!"

i know i camwhore alot... ahahaha

and yes poor En Long had to suffer with me for the rest of the night.
yes thank you and i really appreciated the laps and the making fun of me and the patience you had :]

Vincent's Bdae 2 April 2010:
So its Vincent's 72nd bdae at SheBangs. Damn impromtu the day before and yes as expected Mr Teh would pangseh us! But its ok because we had fun and i think i drank far too much again!!! -_-''
and yes someone just had to vomit on himself ah!!

After Shebang, En long came to look for me.. acc Rong hui for his frozen Frog's legs! hahaha
den walked to this pub call X bar to look for En Long's frens and yes drink more!!.
ok very evil me poured all those Martell back into the coke mixer when his frens were not looking because i doubt En Long and Rong Hui wants to drink anymore :x

Adjourned to Phuture. YES AGAIN at 3.30am!! Rong Hui left after a while and leaving me and Mr Chua at Phuture.. with those smelly ah bing ges.. went to Zouk and saw Keidi with her frens and bro.. and thank you once again for sending me back and hahaha .. :]

sometimes i really dunno wtf i am doing with my life anymore.
God is never gonna be fair to me..
ever since you came... i realised i've never been happy a single day in my life..
yes i tried to give u everything you've wanted.. even everything that was beyond my means..
why cant i just pick up the farking courage and let go of you now?
why bother to make myself suffer like crazy now?

sometimes i really just want to be happy and loved by someone i love..
is it farking too much to ask for?
:]
i know i'll never be the same..
never be that same old tracy that everyone knows.

loving you is so farking hard..

love always,
tracy

emotions flying..

2010-02-28T10:30:00.005-05:00

sometimes i wonder so badly..
whats the use of holding on..
whats the use of reminiscing..
and whats the use of looking to the future..
when it really always boils down to nothing?

u. that particular u.
u said to never contact..
but yet after she left..
u still did contact me..
what am i to you really?
i know it will never materialize, it will never happen.
sometimes it really hurts so bad.
knowing very well i will falll into your trap time and again...
i kind of gave up resisting..
i gave up hoping..
i just want to spend every moment happily..
26 February 2010 :]

2010 started on a rather jittery and jumpy note.
met a couple of new frens.
frens i believe i could keep for life.
and then u came.
i thought things were looking on the bright side definitely..
but it changed when i knew u will never give *** up :]
i should have known.
yes i knew.
:]
but now you're still back?
haha such a dilemma.

CNY is over..
Vday is over
My 24th bdae is over.
i guess its time that i should pick up the broken pieces and move on.
maybe its time for a new life.
a new love and a new job.
a new direction in life :]

just attended Randy's wedding this week.
saw a lot of familiar faces :]
saw the face i most wanted to see :]

a couple of photos to end of this post.
will upload the rest when i have more time to myself.

Time to head to bed.
gd nitez..

love always,
tracy

Happy Lunar New Year and Happy Valentines' Day~!

2010-02-14T03:28:00.002-05:00

Here's wishing all a very Happy roaring Tiger Year and a Sweet Valentines' Day~!

Love always,
Tracy

2010 Wishlist

2010-01-22T07:10:00.007-05:00

A very quick update on my wishlist for 2010!

1. A new digital camera please! (Canon please and if there's any sand proof ones)
2. Lasik.... ( i can't stand how dry my eyes are even when wearing dailies)
~~3. Gift Vouchers ( levis, Taka, Isetan, Charles & keith,~~ URS, ALDO, Forever 21, Topshop etc.)
4. A trip to BKK please. ( i need to drink my thai ice milk tea and my zhu jiao fan!)
5. Preferably to travel again to Taiwan or even a short getaway to Redang Island or Aussie!
6. A better pay so that i can do more....
7. More time with my family and frens... ( i know this will prolly be one of the toughest to accomplish given the kind of job i hold..)
~~8. Make more~~ frens that are worth keeping :]
9. A better love life and a deserving SO ( Significant Other)
10. A new wallet ( Gucci, LV, Burberry)
~~11. A sling bag big even for normal weekend trips ( size of an A4 paper, Gucci, LV or COACH)~~
12. A diamond ring ( dun need those in the thousands, those less than $200 i'll be happy too )
13. A gym membership / slimming / yoga or facial centre membership
14. To lose 5 more KG
~~15. Fairer~~ and better complesxion
16. Learn a new language
17. Own personal car so that i can bring my family out every weekend
18. Less emotional and not so affected by every single little thing
19. Happier and to smile more..
20. think and worry lesser
21. Chocolate buffet at Fullerton
~~22. To watch NEW MOON!!~~
~~23. to see you at least~~ once a week
24. drink lesser
25. healthier me
~~26. drink more toffee nut frappe before the season is over..~~
27. spend a wonderful Xmas, NY, VDAY, CNY and My 24th Bdae..
28. wii
29. 1 or 2 seater sofa or 1 or 2 seater bean bag for my room
~~31. CK Euphoria Perfume for Women~~
32. Christian Dior Miss Cherie Perfume
33. Dinner with you at Meritus Mandarin Chatter Box, CHICKEN RICE followed by ~~durians~~
~~34. 6 slices~~ or 6 whole small cakes from 6 different person for my bdae
35. Caramel brown hair, rebonded hair and gorgeous bangs
36. Abalone for CNY
37. Chanel Stud earrings
38. to be continued..

Love always,
Tracy

Somewhere over the rainbow

2010-01-10T09:39:00.002-05:00

had a very impromptu meetup for dinner with Mr Happy.
hahah i'm not gonna tell you who it is..
but he's someone who just brings happiness ..
hahah ok la its because he's someone who is so happy..
i also feel damn happy when i am with him!
i need to be around more people who are very very happy..

n so Mr Happy met up with me at tampines mall for dinner after his work :]
Had ajisen and chatted about a couple of things..
and i realised he is an iPhone *idiot* !!
owning an iPhone but dunno how to make full use of it..
and so very nice Miss Ong taught him a couple of things
and also showed him the wonders of the google map!

adjourned to pick up his car where i made a toopid request of wanting to drive..
okay so i drove out of the carpark and suggested Dempsey..
then i realised i dunno how to go to Dempsey...
so stopped over at the nearest bus stop where Mr Happy took over..
i think i still preferred to be driven around..

took a walk around Dempsey and then headed to Ion..
took a stroll along orchard road and talked about alot of things...
really.. you're a very happy person..
and its really a gd thing to hang out with you..
cos i naturally will feel damn happy ~!
haven felt so happy in such a long long time :]

and in Mr Happy's car, i heard this song..
this particular song that i am sooo addicted to..
thank you Mr Happy for taking time out to accompany me..
and for making me feel really happy :]
and for listening to my rubbish
and driving me around :]

Somewhere over the rainbow way up high
And the dreams that you dream of
once in a lullaby
Somewhere over the rainbow bluebirds fly
And the dreams that you dream of,
dreams really do come true
Someday I’ll wish upon a star, wake up where the clouds are far behind me
Where trouble melts like lemon drops
High above the chimney tops,
that’s where you’ll find me
Somewhere over the rainbow bluebirds fly
And the dreams that you dare to, oh why, oh why can’t I?
Well I see trees of green and red roses too,
I’ll watch them bloom for me and you
And I think to myself, what a wonderful world

Well I see skies of blue and clouds of white
and the brightness of day
I like the dark
and I think to myself, what a wonderful world
The colors of the rainbow so pretty in the sky
are also on the faces of people passing by
I see friends shaking hands saying,
How do you do?
They’re really saying, I – I love you
I hear babies cry and I watch them grow,
they’ll learn much more than we’ll know
And I think to myself, what a wonderful world

Someday I’ll wish upon a star, wake up where the clouds are far behind me
Where trouble melts like lemon drops
High above the chimney tops,
that’s where you’ll find me
Somewhere over the rainbow way up high
And the dreams that you dare to, oh why, oh why can’t I?

never felt so relaxed and happy in such a long long time..
:]

Love always,
Tracy

Everybody in Love

2010-01-06T01:26:00.000-05:00

Everybody in love!

Everybody in love, go on put your hands up,
Everybody in love, go on put your hands up,
Everybody in love, go on put your hands up,
If you’re in love, put your hands up,

You know you need someone,
When the need’s so strong,
When they’re gone you don’t know how to go on,
So the whole world is stuck in a moment,
Standing still until they come back,
You accept that they’ve, got things to do,
But sometimes in the end there’s nothing left for you,
If hurt is missing your baby,
I’ve done too much of it lately,

Every minutes like an hour,
Every hours like a day,
Every day lasts forever,
But what else am i gonna do,
I’d wait forever and a day for you,
I wait up, wait up,
I can’t eat, I can’t sleep, what else could it be,
missing you so deep,
long as I’m where you’re going to,
I’d wait forever and a day for you,
I wait up, wait up for you,

And even when we mad, and say we’re through,
Deep inside you feel the same way i do,
Might as well turn around and just end this,
Cause it’s harder trying to stay mad,
I could tell you that you can’t stay here,
Knowing just as soon as you disappear,
That I’ll be missing you baby,
Soon as you get up and you walk away,

Everybody in love, go on put your hands up,
Everybody in love, go on put your hands up,
Everybody in love, go on put your hands up,
If you’re in love, put your hands up,

Already Gone..

2010-01-04T23:56:00.003-05:00

i can't put into words how i feel at the moment after yesterday's "AGM".

yes you saw it. AGM :]

anyway it suddenly began to dawn on me about alot of things.

for these 2 years that i have been with this company...

i have wasted so much of my time and effort in alot of things :]

don't wish to go through it again.

maybe its time to rethink what i really want.

i had dinner with my Dad yesterday. Yeap just the Father and Daughter.

I'm always closer to my Dad.. hahaha once someone even told me

that dad are always closer to the daughters because

the daughters are their lovers from the past life!

EEEwww!! ahahaa

anyway back to dinner...

i realised that my Dad has aged so much

and that this stupid daughter of his has not done much

ever since she stepped into the working force...

isnt it time i start doing something about it?

the least i could do is to give more family allowance and also to buy a family car

so i can ferry them around for dinner..

i dun mind being a chauffeur for my family :]

anyway a song that i kinda like recently :

Already Gone - Kelly Clarkson

Remember all the things we wanted
Now all our memories, they're haunted
We were always meant to say goodbye
Even with our fists held high
It never would have work out right, yeah
We were never meant for do or die
I didn't want us to burn out
I didn't come here to hurt you now I can't stop

[Chorus]
I want you to know
That it doesn't matter
Where we take this road
But someone's gotta go
And I want you to know
You couldn't have loved me better
But I want you to move on
So I'm already gone

Looking at you makes it harder
But I know that you'll find another
That doesn't always make you wanna cry
It started with the perfect kiss then
We could feel the poison set in
"Perfect" couldn't keep this love alive
You know that I love you so
I love you enough to let you go

[Chorus]

You can't make it feel right
When you know that it's wrong
I'm already gone, already gone
There's no moving on
So I'm already gone
Ahhh already gone, already gone, already gone
Ahhh already gone, already gone, already gone

Remember all the tings we wanted
Now all our memories, they're haunted
We were always meant to say goodbye

[Chorus]

You can't make it feel right
When you know that it's wrong
I'm already gone, already gone
There's no moving on
So I'm already gone

Love always,
tracy

pissed...

2010-01-03T12:01:00.002-05:00

i'm so pissed off with you now..
that i could simply just put a gun to your head and fire if i had one now.
You're a farking CCB who is seriously good for nothing.
really good for nothing.

Sometimes i really wish that you would just die
and stop wasting the food and air on this earth.

argh!

pissed,
tracy

2010!

2009-12-31T13:46:00.002-05:00

It’s hard to watch things change when all you want is for them to stay the same. It’s funny but stupid how you want everything and nothing at the same time. It’s crazy when you want to let go, you keep holding on, but when you want to move on but you’re stuck right where you started. And it’s weird how feelings come and go and you can’t decide what you want, and how you have so many things to say but you don’t know where to start.

Happy New Year to all my lovely folks out there.
Lets throw away all the bad things in 2009, keep the sweet things for memories and welcome this new 2010 with open arms!

Xmas, New Year, Vday + CNY and Bdae... Wishes plus Resolutions!

1. A new digital camera please! (Canon please and if there's any sand proof ones)
2. Lasik.... ( i can't stand how dry my eyes are even when wearing dailies)
3. Gift Vouchers ( levis, Taka, Isetan, Charles & keith)
4. A trip to BKK please. ( i need to drink my thai ice milk tea and my zhu jiao fan!)
5. Preferably to travel again to Taiwan or even a short getaway to Redang Island or Aussie!
6. A better pay so that i can do more....
7. More time with my family and frens... ( i know this will prolly be one of the toughest to accomplish given the kind of job i hold..)
8. Make more frens that are worth keeping :]
9. A better love life and a deserving SO ( Significant Other)
10. A new wallet ( Gucci, LV, Burberry)
11. A sling bag big even for normal weekend trips ( size of an A4 paper, Gucci, LV or COACH)
12. A diamond ring ( i dun need those in the thousands, those less than $200 i'll be happy too )
13. A gym membership / slimming or facial centre membership
14. To lose 5 more KG
15. Fairer and better complesxion
16. Learn a new language
17. Own personal car so that i can bring my family out every weekend
18. Less emotional and not so affected by every single little thing
19. Happier and to smile more..
20. think and worry lesser
21. Chocolate buffet at Fullerton
~~22. To watch NEW MOON!!~~
23. coffee session with someone
24. drink lesser
25. healthier me
26. drink more toffee nut frappe before the season is over..
27. spend a wonderful Xmas, NY, VDAY, CNY and My 24th Bdae..
28. wii
29. 1 or 2 seater sofa or 1 or 2 seater bean bag for my room
30. i can't think of anymore.. will update if i can..

Love always,
tracy

2010....

2009-12-27T10:16:00.002-05:00

and so Xmas is over. now are we all ready to welcome the new year?
it kinda scares me that 2009 is gone in a blink of an eye..
yes there were plenty of upsetting things this year and it really irritates me
to a certain degree....

i'm hoping to receive the new year with a big bang :]

love always,
tracy

Updates!

2009-12-20T09:43:00.005-05:00

so its been dino years since i did a photo entry.
accumulated mountains and mountains of photos.
-_-''

life has been well.. a roller coaster emotionally for me :]

first up, my client's wedding:

Wedding of Leya & Wing @ Fairmont

Group photos taken after the dinner with the clients and fellow contractors :]

with the beautiful bride and the other beautiful ladies.. and just nice on the strike of 12,
it was another client's birthday... so apparently u see him standing on a chair with the rest of the folks toasting to him..

Emcee of the night was Kitty ( also a DJ at 933 FM) and she was *ahem* drunk i suppose.. hahahah basically she was walking around toasting to the peeps around.. hahahah its like she's marrying off her daughter! and then the following photos are taken with the rest of the SingTel folks and also with the peeps from my company..
i'll say its really a beautiful wedding...
makes you wanna get married too..
ya that was just crap from me :]

after the wedding, headed down to Velvet to party the night away and to celebrate SY's birthday..
first time in my life.. i downed Graveyard..
bloody hell..... i think i puked out the abalones that i had during the wedding!!!
phuture still looks the same...
plenty of Ah Bing Ges...
the bouncers and PRs kinda changed..
i guess quite a couple of them have left..
and the last i saw..
they were at another club.. :]

Next up, ZoukOut 2009!:
i swear ZoukOut 2009 was purely bad luck for me...
1. I paid a $7 entry into Sentosa.. and my cab fare amounted to $30!!! before midnight somemore!!!!!!!!
2. I lost my pair of Zoukout tickets... and in the end TZ and me had to purchased a new pair as it was past 9pm and the COM ticket that Donn gave to me couldn't be used.......
3. If i had seen someone earlier, i wouldn't have to buy my tickets again!!!
4. my iphone died on me less than 2hrs after i stepped into Sentosa...
5. I lost my lipbalm...
6. i had my legs numbed for 3 hrs! and someone almost puked on me and i had to clean that person up because he was sooooooo gone..... he even wanted to lie in his puke... -_-''
7. dropped my iphone and cam onto the sand while trying to save this person from lying in the puke... cam got scratched pretty badly and there were still sands stuck in the lenses now T_T
8. Hangover for me. and a major headache.
9. the next day.. that person told me he couldn't remember a thing and even *blame me for helping him*.....
10. Lesson learnt, leave him to die in his puke :]

So the first peeps i met were Jeremy and Cherie but forgot to take photos with them..
hopped over to 42below where we had a few cups of vodka redbull before moving back to the SingTel tentage for more booze..
the ST folks were pretty wild by the time i got there!
everything was a blur by then because i downed my drinks too quickly and i was snacking on candy floss at the same time!
the tequila shots from Donn almost killed me..
but i guess he died first... :]

photos with the ST folks.. i didn't really enjoy this year's ZoukOut because i had my legs numbed for 3 hrs and after that i got really tired and just wanna head home and hit the sack...

me and TZ slacking at a corner while i had my legs numbed for 3 hrs :]

The next time round... i guess i will think twice about going for ZoukOut again least i get reminded of all the bad things that happened during and after ZoukOut...
now i'll need to get myself a new Camera thanks to ZoukOut and you.....

finally done with all the photos! been a really long year and this year is finally coming to an end..
feels kinda relieved but at the same time worried about how 2010 will be like....
There's so much on my mind for 2010 and so much i hope i could achieve and accomplish in the new year...
in a blink of an eye, Xmas will be approaching and then the New Year, Vday + CNY and finally my birthday and i'm freaking gonna be in my mid twenties!!!!!!! save me ah~!~~~

well since i'm typing out this entry, i reckon i'll take down the couple of things i am hoping to get and accomplish for Xmas, New Year, Vday + CNY and Bdae... Wishes plus Resolutions!

1. A new digital camera please! (Canon please and if there's any sand proof ones)
2. Lasik.... ( i can't stand how dry my eyes are even when wearing dailies)
3. Gift Vouchers ( levis, Taka, Isetan, Charles & keith)
4. A trip to BKK please. ( i need to drink my thai ice milk tea and my zhu jiao fan!)
5. Preferably to travel again to Taiwan or even a short getaway to Redang Island or Aussie!
6. A better pay so that i can do more....
7. More time with my family and frens... ( i know this will prolly be one of the toughest to accomplish given the kind of job i hold..)
8. Make more frens that are worth keeping :]
9. A better love life and a deserving SO ( Significant Other)
10. A new wallet ( Gucci, LV, Burberry)
11. A sling bag big even for normal weekend trips ( size of an A4 paper, Gucci, LV or COACH)
12. A diamond ring ( i dun need those in the thousands, those less than $200 i'll be happy too )
13. A gym membership / slimming or facial centre membership
14. To lose 5 more KG
15. Fairer and better complesxion
16. Learn a new language
17. Own personal car so that i can bring my family out every weekend
18. Less emotional and not so affected by every single little thing
19. Happier and to smile more..
20. think and worry lesser
21. Chocolate buffet at Fullerton
22. To watch NEW MOON!!
23. coffee session with someone
24. drink lesser
25. healthier me
26. drink more toffee nut frappe before the season is over..
27. spend a wonderful Xmas, NY, VDAY, CNY and My 24th Bdae..
28. wii
29. 1 or 2 seater sofa or 1 or 2 seater bean bag for my room
30. i can't think of anymore.. will update if i can..

time to head back to my stuffs.
nitez all..

love always,
tracy

Emoism kicks in

2009-12-16T11:59:00.001-05:00

Never felt so upset in my entire life.. So much so I wanna dig a hole and bury my head.... Someone please help me to get out of this shit.. it hurts so much to know u want sth so badly n yet u know u can't have it... N things that u do not want.. Keeps coming to u...

Sooner or later I'm gonna lose myself go crazy.. God don't u want me to be better?????

Sometimes i really dun wanna wake up anymore... No more...

Hurts like hell,
tracy..

i'm fine :]

2009-12-08T11:44:00.004-05:00

to all those who were concerned about me..
no worries.
i am fine :]
just a bit too busy :]
but no worries i am doing fine now :D

will blog soon :]

love always,
tracy

regrets

2009-11-29T09:05:00.002-05:00

time and again.. i never fail to do things..
i wake up feeling guilty about.
great.
now this guilt is gonna follow me till the day i die..

GREAT :]

i am such an arse.
i hate how life is spunning out of control again.
i hate how my bank figure is depreciating.

fark life. why can't i just be dead like 4 years ago!!!!!!!!!!

hurts,
tracy

love is?

2009-11-27T12:18:00.004-05:00

i have this crazy and stupid urge to keep blogging and blogging and blogging.
-_-''

its been a while since i have been out with him.
yes things have been up and down.
down and out.
and i have been trying to take things with a pinch of salt.
or rather divert my attention away.

put my attention onto other things.
but time and again..
OTHER THINGS tends to make me real mad.
and i wish i was dead.
life of an emotional girl.

if u are reading this.
i still love you and i wanna make things work.
DUN FARKING PISS ME OFF AGAIN!

cb.

u will make a wonderful bf.
but too bad we're not meant to be.

love always,
tracy

crazy..

2009-11-27T11:34:00.002-05:00

yes i know i haven't been blogging in the longest time.
recently something huge happened to me..
or rather my heart, my head..
so badly that i almost spunned out of control..
went mad and killed myself.

yes prolly no one noticed because there wasn't very drastic changes in my daily life..
except that i cried a bit more often.
:]

tough life i have.
yes and now i am still going through this shit.
this relationship shit.

right now i am 23 going on 24 in a couple of months
and i'm definitely so not looking forward to it.
WHO IS?

sigh..quite a couple of folks out there that i know are getting
or have already gotten married this month.
makes me wonder when's my turn den?
at the rate i am going now.........
i doubt anytime soon..
and it saddens me badly.
its not that i DESPERATELY wants to get married...
but i want someone that i can spend the rest of my life with..

someone who wouldn't mind my crazy habits..
someone who wouldn't mind if my butt got bigger..
someone who would love everything about me..

but what i am seeing now?
GOD PLEASE TELL ME WHAT TO DO.

i love you.. i really do..
everytime i tell myself to give ourselves more time..
tell myself prolly its my temper and my crazy emotional self..
but every now and time you never fail to disappoint me..

right now i am almost close to giving up..
prolly find someone to replace you..
but i know even before i do that..
i must heal myself first.

i'm so lost.
sometimes i feel i do not even know who i am anymore.
someone please steer me to the right path..

love always,
tracy

下雨天

2009-11-22T03:38:00.005-05:00

i suddenly love listening to this song..
suddenly YOU look cute to me..
suddenly i am missing the wrong person?..
suddenly i feel like calling you again..
even if its for nothing..
:]

南拳妈妈 - 下雨天

下雨天了怎么办我好想你
不敢打给你我找不到原因
什么失眠的声音
变得好熟悉
沉默的场景做你的代替
陪我等雨停

期待让人越来越沉溺
有谁和我一样
等不到他的谁
爱上你我总在学会
寂寞的滋味
一个人撑伞一个人擦泪
一个人好累

怎样的雨怎样的夜
怎样的我能让你更想念
雨要多大
天要多黑才能够有你的体贴

其实没有我你分不清那些
差别接近还能多一些
别说你会难过
别说你想改变
被爱的人不用道歉

期待让人越来越疲惫
有谁和我一样
等不到他的谁
爱上你我总在学会
寂寞的滋味
一个人撑伞一个人擦泪
一个人好累

怎样的雨怎样的夜
怎样的我能让你更想念
雨要多大
天要多黑才能够有你的体贴

其实没有我你分不清那些
差别接近还能多一些
别说你会难过
别说你想改变
被爱的人不用道歉

怎样的雨怎样的夜
怎样的我能让你更想念
雨要多大
天要多黑才能够有你的体贴

其实没有我你分不清那些
差别接近还能多一些
别说你会难过
别说你想改变
被爱的人不用道歉

被爱的人不用道歉

slowly learning to let go..

love always,
tracy

Sick

2009-11-18T13:12:00.001-05:00

Am down with a very bad flu and sore throat.... Will prolly take mi a while more to blog and update those outdated photos... Till den.. Good night!!

Love always,
Tracy

Priority or Option?

2009-11-04T12:02:00.003-05:00

Had a couple of things to finish in the office n suddenly this phrase came into my head... *why place them as your priority when they only consider you as their options?*

Posted this on facebook and surprisingly a couple of folks out there agrees with mi....

Damn tired lately.. Haven been able to slp well at all.... Sucks to feel like this...

Off to bed, it's gonna be a long day later....

Love always ,
Tracy

Disappointed

2009-11-02T13:53:00.001-05:00

I dunno y... But I'm utterly disappointed in your replies.. So much so it hurts to know they r coming from u........

Love always,
Tracy

Vote for me please!!

2009-11-01T11:12:00.001-05:00

Vote me me please!!!

Love always,
Tracy

life is..

2009-10-31T14:21:00.002-04:00

and so i gave up clubbing earlier for a couple of reasons not mentionable.
:]
finished work earlier and took a bus to CWP to wait for the BF..
arsehole.. made me wait for 1.5hrs!
but i understand he had to finish serving his customer before he could leave..
sad thing was.. the customer bought so much from him..
but also no use.. because he still hasn't gotten his sales man code :(

lately been really tired out by alot of things..
its like i'm secretly screaming for help somewhere..
Brother Bear says i am wonder girl..
that i can handle work and personal stuff well enough..
or rather i have soooo much shit happening in my life and yet i still can
smile when i am out with people...

maybe i'm just damn two faced?
hahaha
or i've plenty of masks :]

sometimes i just ask for life to be a bit more simpler :]

nitez

love always,
tracy

Fr3b Mentholatum Acnes Medicated Creamy Facewash

2009-10-30T13:40:00.004-04:00

Time for a product review:

and so i've received an email from Fr3b
(a sampling website i've joined quite a while back)
here's what the email says:
Dear Fr3b'r:

Congratulations! You have won an ACNES Creamy wash hamper as you are selected for ACNES blogger campaign of the year!

so i got someone to head down on my behalf to collect the item!
and this is what was given to me:

hmz i know what you are thinking :]

anyway i got Mr Leong to be my reviewer instead since i do not fit into the
oily or acne skin category and i reckon the facewash would not show any effects on my skin.

A little note on the product:
# Mentholatum Acnes enhances the skin's resistance and create healthier skin that prevent acne, pimple scars and visible pores.

# Foaming face wash is formulated to prevent acne, soothes redness and skin irritation caused by acne. Helps remove excess sebum. Hypoallergic tested and enriched with Vitamin C, leaving skin soft and moisturized.

A little writeup on the condition of his skin:

Mr Leong has oily skin and normal cleansers(even some meant for oily skin) doesn't work very well for him because after 1-2 hours of cleansing his face, the oil and shine starts to come back again.

see how only his face is. using oil blotters on his face.

Some cleanser even dries his skin up so badly after washing that his skin tends to flake after washing. Just imagine the terror of flaky skin and 1-2 hrs later, oil and shine!

so i got him to try out the Mentholatum Medicated Acnes Creamy Face wash for about a week.
and here's the review from him:

Facewash foams up easily with just a small amount and has a pleasant smell when applying it to the face.
After washing, face does not dry up easily and there's no flaky or ultra dry feeling on the skin. No residue or a weird film over his face after washing too!

One good thing about this facewash, oil and shine doesn't comes back right after 1-2hours. So his face stays clean for quite a couple of hours. Talking about oil control, I guess it definitely fares better than the other normal/oily facewash you find in the market. Apparently it took half to 3/4 of the day then he started to experience the oily feeling on his face. and he didn't breakout during the one week! Not too bad for a starter.

Till den..

Love always,
tracy

what a day...

2009-10-30T11:21:00.002-04:00

i've been feeling really down lately.....
bf is not understanding..
family is in some weird situation..
everything seems to be spinning out of control yet again...
great :]

this week feels like the worst week of my life......
was talking to vivian the past few days..
lucky girl is getting married to someone who loves her alot..
hahah beats that stupid guy right :X

and so we were talking about Mr Ho..
yes i know alot of you will think its crazy that we both are talking about
this topic right?
but i guess its time to put everything behind..
but still its damn funny la!

bf says he's gonna take 3 years to earn alot of money and then marry me...
-_-''
hahaha

prolly i might be dead by den :]
prolly :]

okay... enough for today...
had enough of crying today cos of the never ending problems....

love always,
tracy

Rain Rain go away

2009-10-29T23:53:00.002-04:00

and so i've decided to shift my blog back to blogger!!
can someone please help me with the designs of my blog?
Any nice backgrounds or template that i can use?
email me at blurhoney17@gmail.com

i'll appreciate your help :]

and please for those who do not know me...
I AM NOT MARRIED.
and JAYEN IS NOT MY SON!!!!
-_-''

love always,
tracy

after so long..

2009-10-28T04:15:00.001-04:00

after so long...

i decided to be back with blogger unless i am willing to pay for editing rights to wordpress..

till den its BLOGGER!

love always,
tracy

2009-08-25T05:26:00.000-04:00

i officially wave the white flag to wordpress :(

Happy 6th month :]

2009-08-08T13:42:00.002-04:00

yeah its the 6th month :]

been having this really bad headache for the past few days.
wonder if its migraine or something serious :(

something i've been listening to alot lately :]

Enjoy :]

Details in the fabric

Calm down
Deep breaths
And get yourself dressed instead
Of running around
And pulling all your threads and
Breaking yourself up

If it's a broken part, replace it
If it’s a broken arm then brace it
If it's a broken heart then face it

And hold your own
Know your name
And go your own way
Hold your own
Know your name
And go your own way

And everything will be fine

Hang on
Help is on the way
Stay strong
I'm doing everything

Hold your own
Know your name
And go your own way
Hold your own
Know your name
And go your own way

And everything
Everything will be fine
Everything

Are the details in the fabric
Are the things that make you panic
Are your thoughts results of static cling?

Are the things that make you blow
Hell, no reason, go on and scream
If you're shocked it's just the fault
Of faulty manufacturing.

Everything will be fine
Everything in no time at all
Everything

Hold your own
And know your name
Go your own way

Are the details in the fabric (Hold your own)
Are the things that make you panic (Know your name)
Are your thoughts results of static cling? (Go your own way)

Hold your own
Know your name
Go your own way.

Are the details in the fabric (Hold your own)
Are the things that make you panic (Know your name)
Is it Mother Nature's sewing machine? (Go your own way)
Are the things that make you blow (Hold your own)
Hell no reason go on and scream (Know your name)
If you’re shocked it's just the fault (Go your own way)
Of faulty manufacturing

Everything will be fine
Everything in no time at all
Hearts will hold

nitey nitey :]

love always,
tracy

:]

2009-08-02T13:07:00.002-04:00

Happy Birthday to Mummy :]
Happy Birthday to Aunty Janet :]

Celebrated their birthdays on the same day at different time.
Luckily i saved my stomach for dinner :]
Headed to Austwine for pork knuckles with Aunty Janet and Family :]
Think i had a bit too much white wine!

After that headed down to meet the family to celebrate mummy's birthday.
Had steamboat at this place near my Dad's work place.
The amount of prawns they had!!!!!
Goodness..

its great to see people really happy on their birthdays :]

i really hate Sundays..
It means i have to work the next day!!!!!
ARGH!!!

anyway off to bed :] tata!!

love always,
tracy

this is just life :]

2009-07-31T10:41:00.002-04:00

i suddenly thought of alot of things.
things that i have been missing out on for the past half a year :]
haven i always place my time on things that aren't really that important.
hold on to things that i always deem damn important.
and make a storm out of something that's just very small to begin with?
:]

i'm beginning to grow really tired of all these.
its just a deadly cycle
that just keeps repeating itself.
till the extend that i can hardly breathe on my own now.
was chatting with ah ru over msn earlier.
stupid me missed the chance to catch up with her when she came back to sg earlier
:(
but its okay.
she's coming back for good in Dec!
thats like 3 more months???!!!
haha
means i wouldn't be able to head to Aussie for plenty of reasons.

i've decided to take up part time degree studies in Jan next year.
for my own good :]
and besides i've always wanted to complete my degree as a personal goal in life :]
so full time work, part time studies :]
earn more money buy a little car :P

Love always,
tracy

tired.

2009-07-30T12:03:00.003-04:00

i'm tired of running.
i'm tired of waiting.
i'm tired of changing.
i'm tired of living..

broken,
tracy..

Uncontrollable

2009-07-29T09:54:00.000-04:00

I think way too much has happened lately that this little heart of mine
is beginning to show signs of breaking down.
I am beginning to lose control of my emotions.
many a times i really wish things were simpler..
i could have a simple little life..
nothing flashy..
but isn't reality a total crude that smacks you right back in your face when you least expects it?

I was so closed to losing control.
Each night when i walk home,
i will ask the Lord,
why me?
Haven't i got enough on my shoulders?
Why pile more shit on me?
And then i remember this verse from somewhere:
Cast your burden upon the LORD and He will sustain you; He will never allow the righteous to be shaken.

:]
i haven't been praying in the longest while.
haven't been reading the bible in the longest time.
haven't been talking to God and asking him for wisdom and guidance.
honestly i think i really need that.
and honestly i think i need to go back to church..
anyone willing to bring me to your church this saturday or sunday?
:]

i always thought i am alone.
i never want to share my feelings with others..
for fear they might be even more burdened by me..

i'm so tired...
so effing tired...

love always,
tracy

it hurts

2009-07-27T13:03:00.002-04:00

God.. i am in tremendous pain..
when are you ever going to take me away from this place?
Make me stop crying for all the reasons in this world?
I need to be in your warmth again..

Hurting,
tracy

:(

2009-07-11T13:05:00.000-04:00

with e current swine flu thing going on... I wonder if i still can head to aussie :(
Anyway need to run a roadshow on sunday :(
There's goes my precious sunday :( argh

Time to sleep :)

I do hope things will be better and pray for better health and wealth !

Love always,
Tracy

Papa says mambo....

2009-07-08T10:41:00.003-04:00

not a very happy day for me.
spoilt my entire day just like dat.
sidetrack.. pampered myself with some really yummy donuts and
chocomint freeze from J.Co.
The other brand of donuts besides Krispy Kreme that i really really love!!

gonna do some photo blogging now.
These photos are taken exactly one week ago.
headed down to Zouk with the bro, his fren Jeremy and Jo.
Was actually a very impromptu thing.
Called Jo to head down to zouk to chill
and it was only the 2 of us.
den decided to pop into my Bro's room and ask
if he wanna head down together.
he was on the phone with Jeremy and was kinda reluctant to head down...
but still the sister managed to persuade him down :D

helped them to cut the queue..
and i'm really sick of those whom i'm not close to...
tells my bro to get me to help them to cut queue..
the least you could do was to farking say THANK YOU.
no manners.

anyway back to the photos :]

bro and his frens..

Ong siblings...
seriously i can't believe i am clubbing with my brother....
and watching some girls trying to grind him..
and him watching his sister doing the *dancing queen* moves...
OMIGAWD!!!

Jeremy Tan You Yang!! you are seriously jialat to the max la!!!
1/3 of a jug of long island tea and your face turns red like dunno wat!!!
LOL!!
right next to me you looked damn damn damn weird..
and i suspect he was drunk throughout the night!!!
:X

Jo and me.. the only 2 who were sober...
ok i was a bit tipsy..
maybe because i hadn't drink in a really long long while??
and the only drinks i had that night was 3 glasses of pineapple malibu
and a few random sips of that CMI long island tea..
dunno why but the long island tea tasted supper ERK for that night!

As usual.. made my rounds around zouk to say hello since its been a really really long long while
since i went there to club...
seems like a couple of the PRs and bouncers are not there.
some due to RP being quarantined!
:(

With Wan(One)(Laza)

With Gerald, Fady and Giant!!

poor mr jeremy tan remained red throughout the night!! MUAHAHAHAHAHAH!!

Saw Addie in Phuture and took a couple of photos with him!!

hahaha the following photos are damn funny..
Look at ma bro..
it took 3 takes before he could OPEN HIS EYES and smile at the camera..
his eyes super sensitive to flash!!
unlike his sister ah... :P

me and Jo again!!!

yesterday while i was having lunch with Wei Qiang,
Lian Ji sent me an mms..
before i opened it to take a look at the picture..
was looking at the text that he sent..
*look what i saw on the roads 10 mins ago hahaha!*
i gave out a scream when i saw the photo..

NB!!!!

why do you all always have this kind of luck one ah????????

off to bed...
I AM *PISSED*

xoxo,
tracy

Love Must be Tough..

2009-07-08T01:06:00.005-04:00

its either i have too much on my mind or i'm just damn blur..
went to the showers without taking my towel and fresh new set of clothes!!!!!!!!!
gosh whats wrong with me man?

before i go off ,
some little jokes for you to read :]

The Silent Treatment

A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving
each other the silent treatment. Suddenly, the man realized that the
next day, he would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AM for an early
morning business flight.
Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE), he wrote
on a piece of paper,

'Please wake me at 5:00 AM.' He left it where he knew she would find
it.
The next morning, the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM
and he had missed his flight. Furious, he was about to go and
see why his wife hadn't wakened him, when he noticed a piece of paper
by the bed. The paper said, 'It is 5:00 AM. Wake up.'
Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests.

WIFE VS. HUSBAND

A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a
word.
An earlier discussion had led to an argument and
neither of them wanted to concede their position.
As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs,
the husband asked sarcastically, 'Relatives of yours?'
'Yep,' the wife replied, 'in-laws'

W O R D S
A husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use
a day... 30,000 to a man's 15,000.

The wife replied, 'The reason has to be because we have to repeat
everything to men...

The husband then turned to his wife and asked, 'What?'

CREATION

A man said t o his wife one day, 'I don't know how you can be
so stupid and so beautiful all at the same time.
' The wife responded, 'Allow me to explain.
God made me beautiful so you would be attracted to me;
God made me stupid so I would be attracted to you!

WHO DOES WHAT

A man and his wife were having an argument about who
should brew the coffee each morning.
The wife said, 'You should do it, because you get up first,
and then we don't have to wait as long to get our coffee.'
The husband said, ' You are in charge of cooking around here and
you should do it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for
my coffee.'
Wife replies, 'No, you should do it, and besides, it is in the
Bible that the man should do the coffee.'
Husband replies, 'I can't believe that, show me.'
So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New Testament
and showed him at the top of several pages, that it indeed
says..........'HEBREWS'

God may have created man before woman,
but there is always a rough draft before the masterpiece.

i hope you have enjoyed the above :]

xoxo,

tracy

Monday Blues

2009-07-05T13:01:00.004-04:00

i'm trying to make it a habit to blog everyday.
at least a tiny bit of whats happening in my life
as i seem to keep forgetting everyday :(

anyway that aside..
the BF jsut bought me a new HP..
:]
Nokia 5800.
ok not the latest gadget in the market
but still its the thoughts that counts right???
:D

when it comes to HP..
i am an idiot and i take the longest time to decide the model.
luckily this time round he decided for me.
As per Mr Wang, i take ages to decide on the phone i want..
and its as though i am choosing a BF :D

Right now the BF is so happily playing with the phone..
-_-''

dunno izzit cos i ate something that i am allergic to..
but i developed rashes!!
:(
sadded.
on the happy note though
i got 2 new dresses and 1 new HP :]
whats next?????

caught transformers last nite with the BF.
great show!!!

gonna head to bed soon..
:(
Monday blues is sinking in now~!!!
:((((((

xoxo,
tracy

Cadbury Goodness :]

2009-07-05T08:30:00.003-04:00

i saw this ad a couple of weeks ago when i was having some homemade soup.
Yes. i choked when i saw it.
Interesting i must say.
now i feel like rushing to get a pack of cadbury chocolates!
:]
Enjoy.

love,
tracy

Chilli Stains!

2009-07-03T13:50:00.005-04:00

Joke of the day:

Me: Dear, do you want a pc of tissue paper? There's some chilli stains at the edge of your lips!
Dear: Nope dun want...
Me: Eeeee so dirty la you..... den u dun want to clean it off????
Dear: Nope dun want...
pause for 5 sec...
Dear: Den when u kiss me... u will feel that i am HOT!!
Me: -_-'''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''

I have the lamest bf on this earth!

went on msn today..
den immediately Daryl msg me:

Daryl: Oei wat happen y u lose so much weight!!

now i really really wonder if i really really lost that much weight or is it the angle of the photo...
but after soooooo many folks has commented that i lost weight..
i'm beginning to think that i lost quite a fair bit lehz!!!!
:P

Okie... off to bed...
nitez!!

xoxo,
tracy

:]

2009-07-02T12:18:00.005-04:00

when you are not working and having fun..
time seems to pass by you in the blink of an eye...
but when you are working... it seems to be taking its own sweet time
to slowly slowly step by step crawl past!!
Argh!!

Headed down to Zouk last night :]
its been a while while while :]
the peeps were asking why i lost so much weight...
Gerald: wah u lost weight until bu xiang yang
Joseph: wah u shrunk a size down!
i wonder if i really lost that much of weight..
i noe that my jeans are very loose now ...
hmz.. hahahaha

spent the entire day with him.
comcentre, bugis, Lot 1, home :]
collected our rings (fully paid by him :P)
and
caught ice age 3!
U MUST WATCH THIS!!!
super duper funny...

ok i'm off to bed..
will photoblog soon!

xoxo,
tracy

UPDATES!!!!!

2009-06-21T08:40:00.005-04:00

ok its been donkey ages since i've done a proper entry.
I'm busy.
YES I AM :]
and i'm tired.
tired of the never ending battles i need to fight everyday.
sometimes i wonder..
whats the point of living?

:]

what to do? Aquarians are emo people :]
maybe just a random few :]

Some photos for now :]
First up !
Jayen's Birthday!!
My favourite baby cousin is now 1 year old!!!
His 1st birthday at Chevron's Jurong :]

Adjourned to Chevron's KTV for some sing a long as the rest busies themselves with food and other entertainment. Went to sing K with my AUNTIES... yes in terms of age i'm older but in terms of bei fen.... they are *OLDER* hahahahaa..

maybe cos my ah ma marries damn early la!

Anyway Jayen's mum(my aunty) mentions that her daughter Claire looks like me too!! hahahah

Claire and her mummy...

Me and my AUNTIES!

Did a random event at Comcentre one of the days......

Emcee was Mario of Power 98 :]

together with Mr Choo Wei Qiang hahaha :]

Just finished SingTel Red Hot Sale 2009 at PC Show 2009....

Super tiring but super enjoying for me..

Great company of my coordinators..

AND YOU ALL OWE ME A TREAT HOHZ!!!

and cos of this event...

i'm so scared of DONUTS, SUPER COFFEE & BENTO MEALS!!

Some random loots from Aussie courtesy of my aunty :]

its been really a long long journey....

i think because of random issues and work..

i've been losing alot of weight...

someone even asked if i'm stricken with cancer or something..

how come i lost so much weight in just one week?

well i guess stress really does add on to things :]
time to go....
time for another phase of my life liaoz :]

love always,
tracy

its all over :]

2009-06-14T15:43:00.002-04:00

PC show is finally over!
cheers to all the hardwork, tears and pain..
1 week of suffering..
amazingly.. i enjoyed this show very very much..
had the best company of my boys...

i would say it was hell before the event because of certain matter..
but i'm so glad that i didn't give up :]
so glad that i still went ahead with what i had to do...

nothing beats the sense of satisfaction..

what i'm afraid now is that i will sink back into the big D yet again..
someone save me and bring me out of this shell..
someone show me the way..........
i dun wanna fight anymore..

time to rest my tired feet..
time to rest the emotional and mental me :]

love always,
tracy

i love you baby..

2009-06-07T23:17:00.004-04:00

i need all the strength and energy in the world to pull through for this one week.

i need your love to make me full each day.

i need your care and concern to make me happy and satisfied..

i am going to miss you so much for the rest of this week.

i wonder how am i going to get through this one week without you by my side.

love is such an evil thing.

makes me miss you like crazy.

makes me want to hold you to sleep each night.

makes me want to kiss you goodnight and kiss you good morning each and every day.

i love you baby.

so much so much.

promise to be your good girl :]

love always,

tracy

i wish i could sleep forever...

2009-06-05T22:57:00.002-04:00

i can't hold on any longer.
gonna breakdown soon.
:]
so soon....

i'm so tired.
who is there to lend me a helping hand?

hurting,
tracy..

unworthy..

2009-05-27T03:54:00.001-04:00

what do you do when no matter how hard you try...

you just cannot trust someone????

life is a farking ^#&(%#$@^%# :]

think i shall just stop dreaming and wake up to reality.

maybe i CAN just dream of YOU all night :]

maybe i should..

jumping.up.like.i.am.nuts

love always,

tracy

sweet dreams are made of these..

2009-05-26T04:27:00.002-04:00

i dreamt of you yet again..
:]

Jumping.Up.Like.I.Am.Nuts

Sweet dreams are made of these...

Love always,
tracy

Happy Birthday

2009-05-24T13:50:00.004-04:00

Happy Birthday to my dearest baby cousin Jayen :]

Loves loves

love always,
tracy

lose it..

2009-05-22T14:00:00.001-04:00

i think i completely lost the ability to think properly..
:]

my brain's not functioning well..

cheers cheers cheers

love always,
tracy

in dreams i hide..

2009-05-21T13:10:00.003-04:00

think i lost my concentration or something along that line..
whacked my hand right into the washroom's door..
and now its bruising and it hurts like mad!!

off to bed..
i hate how everything is falling apart now..

on the gd side..
aunty's coming back in a couple of hours :]

y do i always dream of you?

love always,
tracy

taking one step at a time my love :]

2009-05-17T13:46:00.004-04:00

maybe life is really a bitch.
you just can't have your cake and eat it at the same time.
but there are the lucky few out there who can have it and eat it at the same time..

caught a movie lately with him :]
Angels and Demons.
Good thing he read the book before the movie..
so roughly he was able to explain certain parts of the movie that i got lost..

sometimes these are the things i love about him..
but well there are still things that i HATE about him..
hahah well.. ai wu ji wu ...

did up the wall in my bedroom with plenty of photo frames...
photos of my family and closest frens!
hopefully i have the time to get more frames and photos..
still damn plain when there's more than 15 frames on the wall???

ok time for bed :]
nitez :]

take one step at a time my love :]

love always,
tracy

Link up!

2009-05-15T07:26:00.001-04:00

Please update me with your new blog address..

or leave me your link if you want to be linked!

Thanks!

love always,

tracy

rant rant

2009-05-13T23:39:00.003-04:00

i guess i thought about a lot lately.
so much so that its kinda getting cluttered up there because i just couldn't get some out and it gets all stuck up there :]
been chowing down on plenty of food lately..
i guess it might have been due to hormonal inbalance or rather i am just M O O D Y.
:]

the Boys Over Flowers fever blew over in an instance.
but am still listening to the OSTs..
and i still want to **** Kim Hyung Joon! wahahhahaah

Life is such a big joke at times.
sometimes you're just thrust into a situation where you totally have no idea how to react
and then what? stand there and wait for rescue? or just sulk and cry? or just save yourself?

when you have a significant other, a job, a loving family and caring friends,
is that all to life or do you want to have more? MORE? MORE???
Does the 4 category above ensures that you'll be smiling from ear to ear for the rest of your life?
:]

Aunty is having holidays in Brisbane/Gold Coast now!!
CRAB FEAST AND ALL THE FACTORY OUTLET STORE!!!
Somebody kill me la!!!! I'm supposed to go with her!!!! $^&%#^%^#%#
Its ok... Hopefully she'll buy more things back for me!!! :D

okie enough of ranting.
there's something i need to blog out one of these days.
Will do so when i have all the concentration and energy again..

nitez..

Love always,
tracy

Blogged!

2009-05-01T12:05:00.007-04:00

i think its high time i revived my blog :]
been busy working, sleeping, eating and watching Boys before Flowers!
GAWD!!!! the korean version is like a gazillion times better than the taiwan version
>_<>

Some photos that have been rotting in my comp...

Random day in the office with Mat's new toy.. and some random strawberries all the way from Cameron Highlands!! Super duper sweet!!

Next up... IT Show!!

hahha i figure i better blog this out soon..

if not PC show's approaching next...

had 11 really good helpers for my show..

and i'm really grateful for their help!!!! :D

End of the show where everyone's full of smiles !!

My other event after IT show was Brand's Sudoku! :]

really love the balloon setups :]

can't wait for the bigger Sudoku competition in August :D

Next up was Bao jie's birthday!

This 16 year old boy, had his birthday celebrated at a mini restaurant situated at Kovan..

Basket and he reserved about 4-5 tables!!!!!

Each tables cost about 800++?????

like WTF???? for a 16 year old boy's birthday lorz!!

was out with Darling on a random day after work..

shagged to the max... which explains why i'm not wearing any makeup and looking pale like shit!!!

Caught a random movie and had a random dinner at Tampines :]

darling with my shopping bags :D

some random photos with Andy.

This was taken at one of the KTV pubs located at lavender... :]

The All American Rejects Nokia Showcase held outside Zouk!

i noe its damn long ago la..

but i simply just had no time to upload and blog..

Movies at Cineleisure.. :]

and some random photos where he came to IT show to look for me with my lunch :]

Random photos of me.. as usual narcissistic :]

had my hair rebonded recently :]
am glad that my hair is growing long damn fast hee hee..

finished watching Boys over flowers and i'm watching them the 2nd time..
just 1 episode each day..

hahahah

cos i figure i could do more with sleeping..

damn damn shagged out lately because i just couldn't get to sleep till like 3-4 am :(

i noe this is a very very short post..

sorry peeps.. am really tired out lately..

i guess there are some really random issues on my mind lately..

and i am dying to mambo so badly..

but i'm always soo damn tired out to mambo...

-_-'''

went to see Marwan again......

i think some things he mentioned are really so true..

somehow i am hoping that certains things that he mentioned will really come true for me :]

oh man gotta head to bed...

i need slp slp slp slp slp :(

this sucks big time man

nitez peeps..

and before i leave... :]

Kim Hyung Joong :P

photos credits to www.kyustory.com

www.chosunonline.com

www.kbs.com

seriously.. tell me how can one be so damn good loooking????

seriously if he were to smile at me with that 1000 megawatt smile of his..

i'll definitely be blinded and die with no regrets... muahahahhha

love is merely just a game..

its either you win or lose...

love always,

tracy

:]

2009-04-27T04:43:00.000-04:00

i saw you in my dreams last night.
:]
jumping.up.like.i.am.nuts

love always,
tracy

:]

2009-04-16T10:09:00.002-04:00

finally home :]
felt like a guinea pig..
sometimes i wonder when can you REALLY REST when you are sick.
^%#*$#&^$%&@$$@
farking pissed off to the maximum.

love always,
tracy

Randomnes...

2009-04-03T23:41:00.002-04:00

am contemplating on shifting this online diary of mine to either Wordpress or Livejournal..
But i know i'll go crazy over the kind of system they have..
and it might take me aeons to get used to it!

Was sick these few days.. a churning stomach and i was in retching mode. :]
Had a jab last night at my family doc.
and guess what?????
I have to stay off coffee for the rest of my life
if i wanna stop having gastric and stomach flus.
ok maybe it WON'T entirely stop it but it MIGHT reduce the chances of getting it.
The first thought that came to my mind was....
*WHAT??? NO STARBUCKS JAVA FRAPP FOR MY ENTIRE LIFE?*
:((((((

sadded to the max.
ok maybe not.. because i know i'm not one who listens 100% to the doc :]
and the fact that i can't live without my frappucino from Starbucks
i'll trade in long island tea, pineapple malibu or lychee martini for it..

So its the weekend and a couple of my friends have been texting me to get me out..
hee hee paiseh.. really sick and it sucks to the max..
oh man i really miss steamboat...
Next week someone call me out for steamboat please? :P

Qian Ru's currently in Sydney for her nursing studies now.
I'm planning to fly there somewhere mid of July to visit her and at the same time
roam with her to the other parts of Aussie.
Checked out a couple of things including tickets and the weather..
Hmz might fly with Qantas as its still cheaper than SQ and even JETSTAR!!
Hopefully someone could sponsor me my air ticket and then i'll just need to save enough money for my shopping and food as for accomodation wise, i'll be bunking in with Ah Ru !!
and i promised her that i'll cook some chinese food when i'm over..
so i think i'm gonna stock up on salted fish and smelly beancurd!
i'm just kidding..

i can't wait to go Aussie! and prolly my aunt and her colleagues are travelling to Gold Coast during that period of time, perhaps me & Ah Ru can join in :D
i hear Supre, Roxy & Billabong calling out to me!

lalalalalal!!

Love always,
tracy

OUCH!

2009-04-02T00:51:00.003-04:00

i hate it when i'm in such a situation..
i hate it when i'm not in control...
i hate it when i am in such tremendous pain and the only mean little thing to do
to stop those pain is to pop those yucky pills into my mouth >_<

i know i sound like a spoilt brat going * I HATE IT.... blah blah *
but thats how life is it isn't it?
Don't tell me there aren't moments or things that you hate so much
that you will suddenly kick up a fuss or just blow your top?

i'm still in such torturous pain i wish i could grab my stomach out and stamped on it!!
argh!! cheesepie !!
i've been going a little haywire lately..
nowhere here and nowhere there..

sometimes i really miss my schooling days..
:(
i so wanna go back and study..
go and take my degree now....
:(

ARGH~!!!!

life's a bitch that bites you hard in the arse...

love always,
tracy

Can't Help But Wait..

2009-03-30T05:22:00.001-04:00

after so long.. i finally heard that ringtone.. that special ringtone dedicated to you..
you can't believe how good a feeling it was..
just simply puts a smile on my face for the entire day :]

do you still remember?

Love always,
tracy

?

2009-03-26T10:37:00.003-04:00

something is seriously wrong with me... -_-''
or rather my stomach..
sometimes i can eat a cow down..
and sometimes i eat like a freaking mouse!!

what the hell!!
another event coming up..
a smaller scale one though..

someone asked if i'm someone who lives by the day..
i dunno....
honestly i am not sure of it myself..
sometimes i do want to plan for the future and others..
but every other time it so happens that things that i plan for..
doesn't fall in place nicely and after a few tries..
i'll give up..

haiz whatever...... whatever........

Dad's going overseas to work in the next few weeks :(
i'm so gonna miss my Dad
hahaha told him to get me loads of food back :D

lost my train of thoughts suddenly..
argh!

fedup,
tracy

updates updates ~

2009-03-22T09:04:00.003-04:00

gosh just finished packing my room..
someone wasted half of my Sunday..
made me super pissed off..
but then something else left a HUGE smile on my face :P

its been a while since i blogged..
or rather photo blogged..
i've accumulated mountains and heaps of photographs
but then i'm not gonna edit and upload all
given that my lappy is slower than a snail..

some pictures taken about a month plus back..
my birthday..
17 February 2009
:]
took leave and wanted to head to the zoo with Andy
after comtemplating and procrastinating for damn long..
we decided to pick his aunty up and head for lunch first..
in the end we did plenty of errands and didn't make it to the zoo..
sadded..

but well.. the night was not wasted...
he bought me an ice cream cake from Swensens and we drove to Kallang to celebrate my bdae :]

Random night at Mustafa as i was driving :]
i guess Mustafa is becoming more and more boring liaoz..
not much cheap items to buy..

met up with Lian Ji a few days after my birthday for dinner and drinks
as he wanted to pass me my birthday present..
as i was kinda emo that night
and he was LATE!!!
i settled down at Blue Urban Oasis at Century to wait for him..
Emo girls tend to drink?
Hahah ordered a glass of white wine
as the fruit wine i wanted was out of stock...
waited half an hour for Mr Wang..
Luckily you didn't take 1hr..
if not i would have been knocked out by then...
in the end Mr Wang was ALMOST knocked out by that potent
glass of Long Island Tea!!

Spotted a rainbow outside my office on a random day..
simply just made my day seeing such a beautiful sight :]

Met up with Andy after work 1 of the evenings and joined his colleagues
for a pubbing session at Lavender..
didn't quite enjoy myself as its not my type of place to be at..
but well the company was not too bad..
his colleagues were all super friendly
and played super funny games..

Attended Zesh's wedding last month at Marina Mandarin..
i say his SLK convertible....... yum yum :D
hahaha
dinner was good but just for the fact that we were the last ones to arrive
because i finished work a bit later.
adjourned to West Coast Park for a little walk after that as i was driving
and it was a bit early to head home ..
i like to say West Coast Park has better scenery at night than at East Coast :]

i think the both of us started to get real bored
walking in the park when we started to pole dance
and post for pictures with the lamp post!!

Attended the launch of Nokia 5800 Comes with Music @ Zouk the other night..
Super crowded and also disappointed that we were not one of the few to be entitled
to buy the phone at 58cents!!
But nevertheless drove to east coast for sight seeing before heading home..

Had a random coffee session with my colleagues before CNY..
chatted till the wee hours about everything under the stars..
hoping for more of such sessions..
and i think there's a UC BBQ coming up soon...

Now for the photos that are taken recently !!
The usual narcissistic me before heading to Wine Bar with my clients..
organised a little gathering with the folks from SingTel & Nokia..

saw Jing Xian outside Zouk and this fellow..
He's like barely 20 and he wants to look like he's 30!!!
hahahahaha
saw Paul and a couple of others there too..
Waited for our clients to appear..
ordered 42 and below, pineapple malibu and a few buckets of Heineken..
was rather high and tipsy after 1 hour of drinking.......
basically the other ladies didn't really drink that much..

Headed into Phuture with Jessica to walk around as its been quite a while since i clubbed...
realised that there are quite a number of Ah Bing Ges..
Think its the POP period :]
did a couple of random stuffs..
had my fortune told by *Master* Ian...
the folks left one by one..
leaving Ian, Randy and me the last at winebar..
tried our best to finish the drinks!!
Ian sent me home after that ..
Thank you so much :D

Met up with Andy on a random day at Orchard..
initially he wanted to head to hello! Comcentre to change his iPhone cable
but they were doing stocks take..
so we just headed to Cine to have our lunch
and did some random shopping around Orchard
before he took the Red Line
and i took the Green Line back home :]

met up with Darling yesterday for a last minute movie and dinner..
will upload the photos soon as i'm really freaking tired and lazy after packing my room..
:]

As for the photos taken during the IT show..
will try to upload them here once i have the time..
:]

i think randomly plenty of things and issues have been popping up..
and i have no idea why..
some things have been complicating my heart and head..
:(

i dunno why but it just kinda sucks to be in this situation..
i really think i need a solution out..
maybe I'll wait till Marwan is back in SG
and seek out his advices :]

for now.. its time for miss ong to rest...

that short 20 mins... :]

Love always,
tracy

archooooo~

2009-03-21T13:05:00.002-04:00

just finished editing and uploading all the outdated photos.
will do a full entry tmr..
BECAUSE!!!
i am down with a flu and fever just because i was caught in the rain earlier at Parkway!!

for now i'll head to bed!!!
freaking drowsy!!

Love always,
tracy

Tired..

2009-03-16T13:52:00.002-04:00

i had like the longest weekend ever.
But nevertheless i find it rather enjoying.
made a couple of new friends from the fair.
:]
still haven had my fair share of sleep yet..
am planning to get an off day soon..
cos i was practically dozing off when Uncle Romeo was sending us home after dinner..

Met a couple of friends at the fair and they actually mentioned that i've lost weight.
Its good :] hahaha
I can't wait to lose another 5 more kgs and i'll be on my ideal weight..
for now.. i just wanna tidy up myself..
go for my mani and pedi and hair session..
been a while since i headed to the salon and i'm like having some kind of bad hair day man..
need to go and rebond and colour it soon :]

recently my heart and mind's in a mess again..
terrible shit..
things start to pile up after IT show.
damn it again..
but well i had the best event that i did ..
and i saw the most number of eye candies too :P

gonna head off to bed and catch up on my sleep man :]
i will try to upload the photos soon..
gonna club sometime soooooooon :]

Love always,
tracy

2009-03-08T07:00:00.003-04:00

its gonna be a long long week ahead.
freaking tiring to even think about it.
sometimes when people ask me about my pay..
and the things i do and the hours i work..
they always tell me its not justifiable..
recently there's this new colleague in my office..
events background..so he was telling me about his former pay..
about the type of things that his company pay for..
HP bills = $200
Transport allowance = $150 plus addition of what ever you travel and claim
$50 for every other event you help to run
commission for every event you handle
Meal allowance for every show you run
company trip to Taiwan last year..
and some other random stuffs that i forgot.
and once his payslip came up to 4K++
and no cold call needed.

its a bit heart wrenching when you compare the kind of benefits he gets
and the ones he's getting now..
and comparing mine.. :]
i'm just stumped for words.

Dad spoke to me today about work again.
asking if this is really what i want to do?
for the next 5 years..
do i want to hold that kind of pay?
telling me i'm no longer in my teens and stuffs..
a few more years and i can have my own family.
do i want to support my family with that kind of pay?

:]

feels damn terrible to be holding this kind of chat with my dad..
haiz..
sometimes i seriously do not know what to do.
its just damn shitty to be thinking about such things..

but well at least whatever i do.
i can come back to a place call home..
come back to a place where i know people loves me for who i am :]
and i know that i have a shoulder to lean on lately :]

i guess things have changed very much between us..
its a mutual understanding and trust that we have for each other.
which i feel its really more comfortable now.
and maybe entering the workforce has kind of
made us grown up :]

feels good.
no more retarded arguments.

off for dinner with Dad :]

i promise to come back with photos
after my event :]

love always,
tracy

ARGH!

2009-03-01T08:00:00.002-05:00

i completely shocked the hell out of myself today.
i think he was quite cool about it..
like what he mentioned..
things like that needs to happen once so that i'll learnt a lesson
and be more careful in future..

oh gawd..:(

i hate how everything just spun around me endlessly....
irritating..

Argh,
tracy

that ugly underwear!!

2009-02-27T06:45:00.000-05:00

ONE YEAR LIAOZ!!!

loves,
tracy

Love Must Be Tough

2009-02-21T11:49:00.004-05:00

sometimes it does require a bit a time and understanding to get to where you want to end up at..
sometimes its just that amount of patience and effort that humans need to put in to see results..
just like what people always says.. you reap what you sow..
:]

things has been a bit chaotic lately..
be it work, family or relationship..
yes i am with someone now..
i guess a couple of you might know since you're linked to me on facebook :]

i guess this time round its different :]
all i need is patience, trust, love and luck :]
everything in life is a gamble
yeap either you win or lose

anyway was treated to homemade birdnest goodnes from his mummy :]
i sure do need the birdnest for my lungs man :]

i can't wait to be busy at work..
but i know i'll kao pei alot too..
but then again.. i just enjoy working in events :]

off to bed :]

一个人勇敢

love always,
tracy

一个人勇敢

2009-02-20T12:42:00.009-05:00

卓文萱-一个人勇敢

你想要的我不明白
明明可以爱得很自然
两个人世界多简单
就是我爱你你爱我不难
你还是离开

你的决定与我无关
我能理解我不会责怪
这是你给我的答案
你要我接受却还要我等待
等不到一个未来

我不相信爱很难
没有一点温度残留下来
你失踪的爱我的幸福跟你离开
谢谢你那么坦白
原来失去以后比较愉快

不会再伤感
就算爱很难我也不怕失败
一定有一天我会比你想象更勇敢
你带走了爱我在原地不曾离开
谢谢你让我明白
我学会灿烂
一个人勇敢

thought about alot these few days that its kind of driving me crazy.
why can't things be simpler?
ABC?
i guess in life there are far too many hurdles that we must cross.

sometimes i worry too much..
sometimes i can't give a fark about it..
how?

i'm 23 this year..
i ought to be more mature in every aspect of life..
i ought to.....
maybe its just me..
gonna be damn busy after next week..
i hope i don't get too bothered..

love always,
tracy

Happy 23rd Birthday

2009-02-16T23:40:00.002-05:00

maybe this is what i want honestly..
i think maybe i should just let go and give up..
instead of worrying and wondering and hoping?
why go through hell again ?

sometimes i just wonder..
am i just trying to be an arse again?
hahah it makes me wonder at times.
what the hell is going through my head..
i know very well that i cannot pretend that nothing has happened..
and yet i can't ....

its simple..
maybe today will tell me the answers i need to know :]

happy birthday to myself.. :]

love always,
tracy

wishing on a star..

2009-02-13T12:06:00.003-05:00

oh Great!! its Valentines' Day and i survived Friday the 13th! :]
and its 3 more days before i turn 23. Gosh.. someone please stop time.. i dun want to grow older :(
but well there will come a time everyone has to grow up and mature i guess?
Someone asked me what are my birthday wishes this year..
SO since this is my blog.. i'm gonna blog what i want... what i wish la..

ok la.. actually i don't wish for alot of things.. but still i wanna make wishes :]
i don't expect anyone to get them for me..
but i hope i will be able to get them on my own :]
But it'll be good la.. if someone can sponsor me the material ones

My birthday wishes:
1. my cough to go away PERMANENTLY
2. a happier life..
3. HIM
4. LG Prada or Blackberry Bold or iPhone
5. Perfumes
6. Isetan vouchers
7. to save enough money
8. a new laptop in white or black
9. Levi's vouchers
10. Charles & Keith vouchers
11. CASH CASH CASH!!
12. A great birthday
13. A chocolate cake for my birthday
14. a neater table..
15. higher tolerance
16. a new wallet (hopefully gucci or LV or coach)
17. COACH OP ART JULIANNE or SIGNATURE LEAH TOTE in black
18. decent looking wristlet or slingbag from COACH
19. A new watch (granted.. hahah given by Aunty)
20. more projects :]
21. i want to strike TOTO Grp 1 or Grp 2 or BigSweep 1st prize wahahhaahah!

i guess thats about all?
hee
off to bed.....
I love today :]
Feels damn good :]

nite nite

Love always,
tracy

scars..

2009-02-05T11:37:00.003-05:00

I tear my heart open, I sew myself shut
My weakness is that I care too much
And my scars remind me that the past is real
I tear my heart open just to feel

Drunk and I'm feeling down
And I just wanna be alone
I'm pissed cause you came around
Why don't you just go home?
Cause you channel all your pain
And I can't help you fix yourself
You're making me insane
All I can say is

[Chorus:]
I tear my heart open, I sew myself shut
My weakness is that I care too much
And our scars remind us that the past is real
I tear my heart open just to feel

I tried to help you once
Against my own advice
I saw you going down
But you never realized
That you're drowning in the water
So I offered you my hand
Compassions in my nature
Tonight is our last stand

[Chorus]

I'm drunk and I'm feeling down
And I just wanna be alone
You shouldn't ever come around
Why don't you just go home?
Cause you're drowning in the water
And I tried to grab your hand
And I left my heart open
But you didn't understand
But you didn't understand
Go fix yourself

I can't help you fix yourself
But at least I can say I tried
I'm sorry but I gotta move on with my own life
I can't help you fix yourself
But at least I can say I tried
I'm sorry but I gotta move on with my own life

my scars remind me.. that the past is really real..
too real to be true..

it hurts,
tracy

BKK Loves~

2009-02-04T09:54:00.003-05:00

am damn sick of everything that is happening suddenly. so badly i feel like throwing up at everyone. Anyway came back from Bangkok recently and am thankful that most of the things are proudly sponsored by my aunty.

my red red hair.. and my Advanced birthday present from my aunty.

Chinese Niu Year was well spent with all the loved ones and especially my cute little Jayen!!He's turning 1 soon!
CNY Eve was spent running around the east to do some last minute shopping for clothes.
rushed down to Bedok for my mani and pedi session and den rushed back home again for reunion dinner. After dinner, was rushing to pack my luggage as i'm set to jet off to BKK on the 2nd day of CNY :]

CNY Day 1 - 26 Jan 2009
Woke bright and early for Bai Nian at Granny's place. As usual relative talks and stuffs..hahah asking the same questions..
and this year is different because there's cute little Jayen :D
he is reallly such a sweet darling and angel..
was shocked when i saw Claire with a black eye..
poor little girl fell off the bed and hit her eye :(

Me and Jayen

Me and Claire

My aunties..

Me and Fatty and Dad..

After my relatives left, headed down to Andy's house to bai nian :] Waited for him and Aunty Janet to get changed and stuffs and we cabbed down to his Gan Moh's house to bai nian.
I guessed we arrived quite late haha. There were peeps BBQ-ing and there were those playing mahjong. Bumped around for a while, headed out to get ice and then BlackJack session started :]

Me, Carol & Anna

CNY Day 2 - 27 Jan 2009
Jet set off to BKK the next day. Am glad that we took Singapore Air there. :] at least there's inflight entertainment for me but half the time i was sleeping :P
arrived in BKK with a heavy heart because of so many things that till now.. i'm still thinking and pondering over it..

Stayed at Grand Mercure Fortune Hotel. Not too bad a hotel. Was supposed to be a 4-5 Stars hotel :] left our luggage at the hotel and headed over to Fortune Town Shopping Mall next door for dinner and some mini shopping. I was sooooo crazy over the pig's leg rice that i definitely had to had some immediately at Fortune Town that i regretted.. Its soooo sweet.. so different from the ones i used to eat at Platinum Mall :(
Even at Tesco, we managed to get quite a handful of items :P
Slept early that night to prepare for MBK the next day :]

CNY Day 3 - 28 Jan 2009 - Day 2 @ BKK
Mahboonkrong Centre.
I was almost BANKRUPT here -_-''
and its definitely one place that i had my mood spoilt so damn badly.
Lunch was at Ramen 8. Anyone who drops by BKK should head to this restaurant to try. I know Jap food and BKK has no link but the ramen here is damn good and cheap :D
In total i had Ramen 8 twice for my entire trip there and 1 bowl of ramen is like 3bucks?

Also had Baskin Robbins. Yummy love potion ice cream and the chocolate fudge!!!!
Bought plenty of food, lingerie here and dinner was at my fav place.
Bar-B-Q Place at the 4th(dunno izzit 5th) floor of MBK.
Its a korean styled steamboat place.
Everytime when i head to BKK, this is also one of the place i must dine at :D

29 Jan 2009 - Day 3 @ BKK
Platinum Fashion Mall & Big C
I was proudly declared bankrupt here. I bought soooooooo much things here, i kinda lost count. And best part was, i had my favourite Pig's leg rice with Thai Iced Milk Tea!! Yummy!! Shopped around till the place closed at around 8pm(thai time) and we walked over to Big C for dinner and shopping at Big C. Dinner was at Yayoi. I had no idea why we had so many jap food there but it was really cheap and worth it :D.
Takeaway for Baskin Robbins back to the hotel. Super Yummy :]

30 Jan 2009 - Day 4 @ BKK
Central World & Big C
As i was really damn broke today... i had to whip out my cards to sign. Bought from Levi's, Naraya and other random stores. Managed to get 2 pairs of shoes from a roadside stall somewhere for 100Baht each!! Met up with Aunty's thai friend for dinner at Yum Saap at Big C. Authentic Thai food and it was damn damn spicy and also had some yummy thai desserts :]
Headed back to hotel early as we had to set out early the next day :]

31 Jan 2009 - Day 5 @ BKK
Chatuchak Weekend Market
Woke up bright and early and took the train to the Chatuchak weekend market to do our last minute shopping before heading back to SG.
Sure it was damn damn hot but its ok because the amount of cheap bargains we got!!!AMAZING!!
The next time round, we should really head to Chatuchak first before heading to other places. Chatuchak should be first on our itinerary!!!
Managed to get some yummy thai desserts at 20baht per bowl. This was the best thai desserts compared to the other places. Before heading back to the hotel, we sat at some roadside stall and had our lunch. I TELL U!!! 100baht for 3 person!!!! damn cheap and the food was damn good. the minced pork rice was spicy and damn gd .. so was the omelette rice and the pat thai!! exchanged conversation with a lady from Switzerland who was dining there too!!
headed back to hotel, bathed and changed and rushed down to the airport!!!
Damn scary.. i went with 1 luggage and came back with 4 and a half :X
Enjoyed my flight back on SQ although was a little reluctant to..
realized that Thailand started protesting on the night we flew back -_-''

This was one of my most fruitful trip but was also one the the worst because of a few things that happened.. Nevertheless a big thank you to my aunty :D

Hopefully i'll strike TOTO this friday and then i can head to Seoul and Brisbane with aunty!!!
Random photos of me...

gonna head to bed soon. not feeling well.. heart's damn heavy and mind's damn busy.. i'm so busy thinking of a few things.. haiz.. watever.

Good nitez

i need a helping hand..

Love always,
tracy

:(

2009-02-02T22:14:00.003-05:00

sometimes i think i procrastinate, worry, complain and emo way too much.
Its taking a toil on me mentally and physically. I wouldn't sleep till late at night thinking of nonsensical stuffs that actually ain't important in any aspects honestly.
I really wish life could be way simpler..for me..I'm already thinking of a few options of how i want to continue to live my life..How i wanna get out of this rut..
How to not make things even more complicating for myself.. sometimes i feel.. things are actually QUITE SIMPLE.. ITS ME WHO COMPLICATES THEM!! -_-''
hur hur..

I miss u, U, YOU~!

Maybe it wasn't meant to be this way..

Love always,
tracy

2009-02-01T10:39:00.004-05:00

Hi Earthlings,

i'm back from the Land of Smiles with mostly everything proudly sponsored by my dearest Aunty :]
Sad to say, its the worst holiday I've ever had. -_-'' Its not the about the people or the food or the things i bought. Its just way to much to voice out here.

sometimes i wish life would be less complicating and there would be lesser people like you in this world. But well its part and parcel of life ain't it? I'm thankful that i still have people who cares and that i can really turn to for help and solutions.

CNY was well spent and the wonderful ang baos and my cute little Jayen and Claire and the very nice ban luck and ban ban kept happening to my cards !! :] met up with the pig earlier. yeap had a long conversation and almost broke into a friendly argument but i believe its good to thrash things out.

honestly i do not know what i want from you and what you want from me. Its complicating enough.. but i believe both of us are mature enough to handle "US"! :]i do hope things will turn out well as time goes by :]

suddenly out of the blue i feel like camping over at Granny's place again :] will do so soon soon and i wanna see Jayen and Claire sooon soooooon man!!!

off to bed.

Love always,
tracy

Love Must Be Tough

cheng sim

Happy Dragon Year :]

Looking back on 2011

再一次相遇我会紧紧抱著你

你还是要幸福

2011 Christmas Wishlist!

This is so true.

很爱过

Better Half of me..

燕燕你好傻。

快乐剩一人分享 快乐就只剩一半

I smurf you.

you were never part of me.

tired

why am i waiting?

I need to blog!

Tell me what to do?

Conjunctivitis

if i promise to blog everyday from now on...

我的錯

its tiring to love you...

說謊

7 its a long journey..

Tired

Feels so trap

Get Sexy :]

emotions flying..

Happy Lunar New Year and Happy Valentines' Day~!

2010 Wishlist

Somewhere over the rainbow

Everybody in Love

Already Gone..

pissed...

2010!

2010....

Updates!

Emoism kicks in

i'm fine :]

regrets

love is?

crazy..

下雨天

Sick

Priority or Option?

Disappointed

Vote for me please!!

life is..

Fr3b Mentholatum Acnes Medicated Creamy Facewash

what a day...

Rain Rain go away

after so long..

Happy 6th month :]

:]

this is just life :]

tired.

Uncontrollable

it hurts

:(

Papa says mambo....

Love Must be Tough..

Monday Blues

Cadbury Goodness :]

Chilli Stains!

:]

UPDATES!!!!!

its all over :]

i love you baby..

i wish i could sleep forever...

unworthy..

sweet dreams are made of these..

Happy Birthday

lose it..

in dreams i hide..

taking one step at a time my love :]

Link up!

rant rant

Blogged!

:]

:]

快乐剩一人分享快乐就只剩一半